It was three minit past ten.
The elevator doors opened with their usual “ding” to signal her arrival.
Dorota was in the kitchen; but when she heard the elevator she left her preparations for the seterusnya day’s breakfast to greet the little miss whom had been the cause of her worrying for the past three minutes.
“Miss Blair!”
There she was, in the entrance hall, not a single Chocolate curl out of place, not a single hair on her head harmed.
Blair was fine. She looked positively proud of herself, and the carrier bags adorning her arm.
Full of new clothes, perfect for tomorrow.
Dorota frowned at them.
“It is past ten. anda were supposed to be back from Serena’s sejak ten. Your mama say anda were to be in katil sejak ten.”
Blair pouted.
“It’s five past. Serena and I went late night shopping at Bendel’s. I’m fine.”
Dorota’s gaze was still hard, and challengingly, Blair tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and raised an eyebrow.
“Serena didn’t have to be utama sejak ten.”
“Serena is very different. Your mama say she didn’t want to see anda when she get home. Bed, Miss Blair.”
Blair’s proud smile fell.
It was just Dorota’s way of phrasing things.
Of course, her mother just meant that she didn’t want to see her up, when she should be in bed.
Not that- that-
It wasn’t going to worry her. It was not going to worry her.
She was fourteen, and in high school.
Grown up.
A lady.
Perfect.
Remaining her composure, Blair forced a soft smile and nodded slowly, going upstairs to bed.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Miss Blair, time to get up.”
She stirred under her comforter.
hari four of High School, hari two of High School Blair.
She exfoliated and moisturised first, before going over to her closet to get ready.
Her new clothes from yesterday were scattered here and there, in their appropriate sections.
Out of it all, none of it was particularly appealing.
Blair almost missed the simplicity of Middle School, when all she had had to be was the right mix of bitchy but likeable, brightly confident, and a Waldorf, to be popular.
The demands were increasing, and Blair could feel it already, on the morning of her fourth day.
Natural charm wasn’t enough to make it into the right circle.
Perfection.
That was what they wanted.
That was what she would be.
Her eyes scanned each rack, critically falling on each item.
Until they fell on her mirror, and then she stopped.
Something wasn’t right, wasn’t what she was used to seeing. Something was wrong.
Imperfect.
She couldn’t put her finger on what it was, but she didn’t like it.
Blair tried to pass it off as tiredness, like she had the hari before. It was early morning, and she hadn’t been in katil sejak ten, like her mother wanted.
Hadn’t had her beauty sleep.
Blair huffed in frustration, and shook her head slightly to stop her mind taunting her.
She was just tired.
Everything was fine.
Perfect.
She resumed to trying to pick out her uniform, but that didn’t even stop her body from twisting once atau twice in the direction of the mirror.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Blair!”
Kati and Is beckoned her over as soon as she came through the school gates.
Blair smiled.
A definite improvement on yesterday.
This was good.
Kati and Is, she had known them both since they were little, were like twins and did everything together.
Including stalking the popular circles.
They didn’t have the intelligence between them to lead the circles, but they both liked being in them.
If anda had them calling anda over, it meant anda were somebody.
“Were anda with Serena last night?”
atau knew somebody.
Blair sighed inside herself.
Outwardly, she forced a smile like she had for Dorota the night before.
“Yes. We went shopping.”
Kati and Is glanced at each other.
“Shopping? But didn’t she- we heard- that she…?”
“We were shopping until ten, late night at Bendel’s.” Blair interjected firmly.
Kati and Is glanced at each other again.
“Ten? After that-?”
“After that, nothing. We both went home, my mom berkata I had to be back sejak ten.” Blair flushed when she realised what she had said.
Kati and Is were both looking at each other, again, and smirking.
“I’ve had a lot of late nights over summer, my mother didn’t want me to be tired for my first week of school. That’s all.” Blair snapped.
Surprisingly, Kati and Is stopped smirking, and turned their attention to her when she snapped at them.
It made Blair smile.
It made her feel confident, powerful, almost perfect.
“So, what’s this Serena’s done? She’ll probably tell me when she gets to school, but-”
“Find out from her.” Is interrupted quickly.
“Yes,” Kati nodded. “We don’t know if it’s true, but it’s all over Gossip Girl.”
They showed Blair their phone’s, and she quickly took Kati’s.
Serena had the first Gossip Girl post out of their grade?
Spotted: S at Socialista surrounded sejak Regis Boys. I’d Cinta to say the high-profile freshman had high standards (Socialista, Regis Boys, gin Martini), but rumor has it that S ended the night easily. atau should that be easy?
Party girls are fun, but shouldn’t freshmen be fresh?
Maybe this one’s a little precocious. She certainly doesn’t seem to have Lost any of that limelight from the boys, atau me. Let’s see how this keeps up- I’ll be watching.
anda know anda Cinta me, XOXO
Gossip Girl
Blair suddenly Lost her envy.
She didn’t want that kind of blogging- even if it did grant her public initial status.
She had to be the perfect one.
Though, it certainly didn’t seem to have Lost Serena any popularity.
Kati and Is were practically gaping in awe.
“I’ll ask her about it when she gets here.” Blair berkata to break the silence, and handed the phone back.
She didn’t know what to do.
She had to ask, but she wasn’t sure if it was something she wanted to gossip about.
Serena was her best friend.
“Ask her now, that looks like Serena coming across the street.” Is gushed, looking over Blair’s shoulder to the gates.
“Oh, my, God.” Kati commented.
Blair turned to look.
It was Serena, and everyone in the courtyard was staring.
Her hair and make up was perfect, as usual.
But it didn’t hide the way she was walking, the way her bag was slumped over her shoulder, and how tired she was.
Blair didn’t care who was watching, she ran over.
Then she stopped.
“Georgina?!”
Behind Serena was the brunette skank who wasn’t even going to their school for freshman year, because they wouldn’t have her unless she could improve her grades and attendance at a boarding school.
She was supposed to be leaving tomorrow; obviously she couldn’t go without causing trouble.
“Make sure she drinks this at morning break.” Blair was handed a bottle, and snatched it with a glare.
“Calm down.” Georgina laughed mockingly.
Blair took one look at Serena and saw nothing but red.
“Calm down? Calm down? What did anda do to her?”
“Blair! Stop shouting.” Serena groaned, rubbing her forehead.
Blair winced.
“Georgina!” She yelled in a whisper.
“I kept her company last night. Then she left me for some boys from Regis, and kept one of them in particular company.”
Blair felt sick.
“What does that mean?”
“That Serena slept with one of them last night.” Georgina’s smile stretched playfully. “Not everybody’s destined to be a blushing virgin until marriage, Snow White.”
Blair glared at the nickname.
She had standards, and wanted things to be perfect, that wasn’t a bad thing.
“I’m off to pack. I berkata goodbye to Serena, but she can’t even remember who she was with last night, so I doubt she recalls. Oh well, I’ll be back seterusnya year. Nice headband.” Georgina looked the smaller girl up and down with a laugh.
Then she was gone.
Blair was left with a hungover best friend, and everyone watching.
She had never hated attention so much, she was so afraid of doing something wrong.
“Serena!” She grabbed her shoulder, hoping it would shake some sense into her. “You’re fourteen!”
Serena pushed Blair’s hand off of her.
“Leave it, Blair.”
Then she was gone too.
Blair was left alone.
Everyone was watching.
Obviously, she had done something wrong.
Perfect.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Serena didn’t talk to her all day.
Blair tried to think it was because she was embarrassed about the whole thing.
She kept on thinking that even when she watched Serena try and retell the whole night to everyone crowding around her, making up what she couldn’t remember; almost everything.
“So, you’re the last virgin from our little group?”
Chuck came up beside her as she walked down the steps after school,.
“No. Nate is too. It’s only anda and Serena who just had to lower yourselves.”
The only time people had spoken to her was when they asked if she was going to lose her virginity.
They turned away every time she replied that she and Nate were waiting.
Chuck was smirking at her.
“Not for long. He seems positively enthralled sejak Blondie’s inaccurate recollections.”
Blair stopped walking, and felt as though somebody had slapped her when all the air left her body.
Chuck realised he had crossed the line when here eyes widened and glistened at the edges.
“I was kidding, Waldorf. He would never cheat on you.”
Blair remained stiff.
“He never talks to me anymore.”
Chuck stared at her, actually regretting what he had said.
“I’ll give anda a ride home, come on.”
“I don’t want to.” Blair murmured, her head spinning with the thought of Nate cheating on her.
“Yes anda do.”
Chuck took her arm and pulled her over to the limo, and Blair didn’t object.
She thought she had been doing everything right, but Nate really didn’t talk to her anymore.
She thought she was being the perfect girlfriend.
atau was she just being uptight and boring?
They were halfway to her building when she broke the silence.
“Do anda think Nate doesn’t want to wait?”
Chuck looked at her.
“Why do anda want to wait?”
Blair stared at her hands, taking that as a yes.
Some girlfriend.
She didn’t even know what her own boyfriend wanted.
“I just want everything to be perfect. For it to be perfect.”
Blair almost cringed at her own words; they sounded pathetic outside of her head.
Chuck eyed her carefully, and smirked.
“With you, I doubt it could be anything less.”
“Ew, well you’ll never know.” Blair laughed, slapping his arm.
She seemed to do that a lot in his limo.
“One day, anda may change your mind about that, Waldorf.”
“Doubt it. Nate and I are going to be together forever, we’re going to get married. It’s been planned since kindergarten.”
Chuck nodded slowly and seriously at her, his eyes retaining their joking sparkle regardless.
“Fine. We’re at your building now, go get that katil ready for Nathaniel.”
Blair actually laughed out loud, despite her disgust.
“Ew! Chuck, we’re going to wait. I’ve decided, there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“Of course not.” He berkata lightly, satisfied he had her smiling again, and made up for his off-hand komen when they had come out of school.
“Bye, Blair.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Blair!”
Just like the morning, when Kati and Is had beckoned her, Eleanor was now calling her to the sitting area in the same way.
She checked her hair and clothes in the mirror, and straightened everything to make sure it was perfect.
“Coming, mother!”
Satisfied, just, she entered and faced her mother.
“You look tired.” Her mother cut her off, before she could say anything. “And don’t wear that kot anymore, it looks like it’s stretched around the waist. The Yves Saint Lauren navy one is much lebih elegant, lebih ladylike.”
Blair nodded, numbly.
She had only bought the navy jaket she was wearing now last night, and liked it.
It had been one of her kegemaran purchases.
“We’ll put that one in the charity closet, for Christmas… what was I thinking buying anda that one?… You’ll wear the YSL one tomorrow, but with what else…?”
Eleanor continued talking to her.
Muttering to herself.
Blair just looked down, studying the flooring.
The marble had a very interesting pattern.
Natural perfection, like Serena.
Blair rubbed her head. She shouldn’t have started thinking about Serena again.
Even though Serena had seemed to have stopped talking to her, she was so worried.
“Are anda listening to me?”
Blair’s head snapped up, and she shook her head apologetically.
“I’m sorry. I’m tired, it was a long day.”
Eleanor stared at her sharply.
“More like a long night. I could tell from looking at anda that anda weren’t in katil sejak ten. They do call it beauty sleep.”
“I’m sorry.” Blair whispered.
“Good. You’ll go to katil straight after makan malam, majlis makan malam tonight.” Another sidelong look, Eleanor had been giving her lots of them recently. “Before dessert.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blair sat on her katil after her dessert-free dinner.
She looked down at her nightgown, at the way it rested on her stomach.
It didn’t look how she had always remembered.
She was going to have to stop eating Pencuci Mulut every night.
She had to be perfect.
Like Serena, and her mother.
Her mother.
Just like Blair wasn’t speaking to Serena, she didn’t think her mother was speaking to her daddy.
Finally, he was home.
For dessert.
Blair had wanted to speak to him, but she had been sent upstairs.
He had telah diberi her a hug, called her Blair-Bear, and then tucked her into bed.
She liked it when he did that, and normally went straight to sleep.
Except tonight, after her dad went back downstairs, and she had heard him and her mom.
Talking.
Shouting.
She had gotten out from under her comforter, and sat on the middle of her bed.
She didn’t want to listen, but at the same time, didn’t want to not know what was happening.
The penthouse was large, she couldn’t hear everything. Only snatches, when their voices got louder.
“Business trip, pleasure trip.”
“Model.”
“Cheating.”
Blair really didn’t want to hear anymore after that.
Her dad would never do what she was scared Nate would.
He wouldn’t.
She refused to believe anything else.
Her family was perfect.
She ran into her bathroom, and shut the door to block out their voices, closing her eyes.
Her bathroom was cool, and delicate, serene.
Serene.
Serena.
Blair had her cell phone in her hand, she wanted to call Serena.
Serena would know what to do, what to say. She always did. Her mom had been in and out, up and down, enough times.
But Serena wasn’t talking to her.
The voices were louder; she could hear them in her bathroom now.
Two tears tracked down her cheeks.
Everything was so out of control.
So imperfect.
She just didn’t know what to do.
Blair stared around her bathroom, looking for something, anything that looked safe, secure, and controllable.
Before she knew it, she was somewhere she had never thought she would be, where she had promised she would never be.
On her knees.
Lifting the lid.
Her toothbrush held with handle up.
Taking a deep breath, she felt the smooth plastic enter her mouth, and touch her throat.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To be continued...
--------------------------------------------------------------
A/N:Not written sejak me.Just found it on Fanfiction.Net and loved it!Hope anda do too!Enjoy
XOXO
~Abby
The elevator doors opened with their usual “ding” to signal her arrival.
Dorota was in the kitchen; but when she heard the elevator she left her preparations for the seterusnya day’s breakfast to greet the little miss whom had been the cause of her worrying for the past three minutes.
“Miss Blair!”
There she was, in the entrance hall, not a single Chocolate curl out of place, not a single hair on her head harmed.
Blair was fine. She looked positively proud of herself, and the carrier bags adorning her arm.
Full of new clothes, perfect for tomorrow.
Dorota frowned at them.
“It is past ten. anda were supposed to be back from Serena’s sejak ten. Your mama say anda were to be in katil sejak ten.”
Blair pouted.
“It’s five past. Serena and I went late night shopping at Bendel’s. I’m fine.”
Dorota’s gaze was still hard, and challengingly, Blair tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and raised an eyebrow.
“Serena didn’t have to be utama sejak ten.”
“Serena is very different. Your mama say she didn’t want to see anda when she get home. Bed, Miss Blair.”
Blair’s proud smile fell.
It was just Dorota’s way of phrasing things.
Of course, her mother just meant that she didn’t want to see her up, when she should be in bed.
Not that- that-
It wasn’t going to worry her. It was not going to worry her.
She was fourteen, and in high school.
Grown up.
A lady.
Perfect.
Remaining her composure, Blair forced a soft smile and nodded slowly, going upstairs to bed.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Miss Blair, time to get up.”
She stirred under her comforter.
hari four of High School, hari two of High School Blair.
She exfoliated and moisturised first, before going over to her closet to get ready.
Her new clothes from yesterday were scattered here and there, in their appropriate sections.
Out of it all, none of it was particularly appealing.
Blair almost missed the simplicity of Middle School, when all she had had to be was the right mix of bitchy but likeable, brightly confident, and a Waldorf, to be popular.
The demands were increasing, and Blair could feel it already, on the morning of her fourth day.
Natural charm wasn’t enough to make it into the right circle.
Perfection.
That was what they wanted.
That was what she would be.
Her eyes scanned each rack, critically falling on each item.
Until they fell on her mirror, and then she stopped.
Something wasn’t right, wasn’t what she was used to seeing. Something was wrong.
Imperfect.
She couldn’t put her finger on what it was, but she didn’t like it.
Blair tried to pass it off as tiredness, like she had the hari before. It was early morning, and she hadn’t been in katil sejak ten, like her mother wanted.
Hadn’t had her beauty sleep.
Blair huffed in frustration, and shook her head slightly to stop her mind taunting her.
She was just tired.
Everything was fine.
Perfect.
She resumed to trying to pick out her uniform, but that didn’t even stop her body from twisting once atau twice in the direction of the mirror.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Blair!”
Kati and Is beckoned her over as soon as she came through the school gates.
Blair smiled.
A definite improvement on yesterday.
This was good.
Kati and Is, she had known them both since they were little, were like twins and did everything together.
Including stalking the popular circles.
They didn’t have the intelligence between them to lead the circles, but they both liked being in them.
If anda had them calling anda over, it meant anda were somebody.
“Were anda with Serena last night?”
atau knew somebody.
Blair sighed inside herself.
Outwardly, she forced a smile like she had for Dorota the night before.
“Yes. We went shopping.”
Kati and Is glanced at each other.
“Shopping? But didn’t she- we heard- that she…?”
“We were shopping until ten, late night at Bendel’s.” Blair interjected firmly.
Kati and Is glanced at each other again.
“Ten? After that-?”
“After that, nothing. We both went home, my mom berkata I had to be back sejak ten.” Blair flushed when she realised what she had said.
Kati and Is were both looking at each other, again, and smirking.
“I’ve had a lot of late nights over summer, my mother didn’t want me to be tired for my first week of school. That’s all.” Blair snapped.
Surprisingly, Kati and Is stopped smirking, and turned their attention to her when she snapped at them.
It made Blair smile.
It made her feel confident, powerful, almost perfect.
“So, what’s this Serena’s done? She’ll probably tell me when she gets to school, but-”
“Find out from her.” Is interrupted quickly.
“Yes,” Kati nodded. “We don’t know if it’s true, but it’s all over Gossip Girl.”
They showed Blair their phone’s, and she quickly took Kati’s.
Serena had the first Gossip Girl post out of their grade?
Spotted: S at Socialista surrounded sejak Regis Boys. I’d Cinta to say the high-profile freshman had high standards (Socialista, Regis Boys, gin Martini), but rumor has it that S ended the night easily. atau should that be easy?
Party girls are fun, but shouldn’t freshmen be fresh?
Maybe this one’s a little precocious. She certainly doesn’t seem to have Lost any of that limelight from the boys, atau me. Let’s see how this keeps up- I’ll be watching.
anda know anda Cinta me, XOXO
Gossip Girl
Blair suddenly Lost her envy.
She didn’t want that kind of blogging- even if it did grant her public initial status.
She had to be the perfect one.
Though, it certainly didn’t seem to have Lost Serena any popularity.
Kati and Is were practically gaping in awe.
“I’ll ask her about it when she gets here.” Blair berkata to break the silence, and handed the phone back.
She didn’t know what to do.
She had to ask, but she wasn’t sure if it was something she wanted to gossip about.
Serena was her best friend.
“Ask her now, that looks like Serena coming across the street.” Is gushed, looking over Blair’s shoulder to the gates.
“Oh, my, God.” Kati commented.
Blair turned to look.
It was Serena, and everyone in the courtyard was staring.
Her hair and make up was perfect, as usual.
But it didn’t hide the way she was walking, the way her bag was slumped over her shoulder, and how tired she was.
Blair didn’t care who was watching, she ran over.
Then she stopped.
“Georgina?!”
Behind Serena was the brunette skank who wasn’t even going to their school for freshman year, because they wouldn’t have her unless she could improve her grades and attendance at a boarding school.
She was supposed to be leaving tomorrow; obviously she couldn’t go without causing trouble.
“Make sure she drinks this at morning break.” Blair was handed a bottle, and snatched it with a glare.
“Calm down.” Georgina laughed mockingly.
Blair took one look at Serena and saw nothing but red.
“Calm down? Calm down? What did anda do to her?”
“Blair! Stop shouting.” Serena groaned, rubbing her forehead.
Blair winced.
“Georgina!” She yelled in a whisper.
“I kept her company last night. Then she left me for some boys from Regis, and kept one of them in particular company.”
Blair felt sick.
“What does that mean?”
“That Serena slept with one of them last night.” Georgina’s smile stretched playfully. “Not everybody’s destined to be a blushing virgin until marriage, Snow White.”
Blair glared at the nickname.
She had standards, and wanted things to be perfect, that wasn’t a bad thing.
“I’m off to pack. I berkata goodbye to Serena, but she can’t even remember who she was with last night, so I doubt she recalls. Oh well, I’ll be back seterusnya year. Nice headband.” Georgina looked the smaller girl up and down with a laugh.
Then she was gone.
Blair was left with a hungover best friend, and everyone watching.
She had never hated attention so much, she was so afraid of doing something wrong.
“Serena!” She grabbed her shoulder, hoping it would shake some sense into her. “You’re fourteen!”
Serena pushed Blair’s hand off of her.
“Leave it, Blair.”
Then she was gone too.
Blair was left alone.
Everyone was watching.
Obviously, she had done something wrong.
Perfect.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Serena didn’t talk to her all day.
Blair tried to think it was because she was embarrassed about the whole thing.
She kept on thinking that even when she watched Serena try and retell the whole night to everyone crowding around her, making up what she couldn’t remember; almost everything.
“So, you’re the last virgin from our little group?”
Chuck came up beside her as she walked down the steps after school,.
“No. Nate is too. It’s only anda and Serena who just had to lower yourselves.”
The only time people had spoken to her was when they asked if she was going to lose her virginity.
They turned away every time she replied that she and Nate were waiting.
Chuck was smirking at her.
“Not for long. He seems positively enthralled sejak Blondie’s inaccurate recollections.”
Blair stopped walking, and felt as though somebody had slapped her when all the air left her body.
Chuck realised he had crossed the line when here eyes widened and glistened at the edges.
“I was kidding, Waldorf. He would never cheat on you.”
Blair remained stiff.
“He never talks to me anymore.”
Chuck stared at her, actually regretting what he had said.
“I’ll give anda a ride home, come on.”
“I don’t want to.” Blair murmured, her head spinning with the thought of Nate cheating on her.
“Yes anda do.”
Chuck took her arm and pulled her over to the limo, and Blair didn’t object.
She thought she had been doing everything right, but Nate really didn’t talk to her anymore.
She thought she was being the perfect girlfriend.
atau was she just being uptight and boring?
They were halfway to her building when she broke the silence.
“Do anda think Nate doesn’t want to wait?”
Chuck looked at her.
“Why do anda want to wait?”
Blair stared at her hands, taking that as a yes.
Some girlfriend.
She didn’t even know what her own boyfriend wanted.
“I just want everything to be perfect. For it to be perfect.”
Blair almost cringed at her own words; they sounded pathetic outside of her head.
Chuck eyed her carefully, and smirked.
“With you, I doubt it could be anything less.”
“Ew, well you’ll never know.” Blair laughed, slapping his arm.
She seemed to do that a lot in his limo.
“One day, anda may change your mind about that, Waldorf.”
“Doubt it. Nate and I are going to be together forever, we’re going to get married. It’s been planned since kindergarten.”
Chuck nodded slowly and seriously at her, his eyes retaining their joking sparkle regardless.
“Fine. We’re at your building now, go get that katil ready for Nathaniel.”
Blair actually laughed out loud, despite her disgust.
“Ew! Chuck, we’re going to wait. I’ve decided, there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“Of course not.” He berkata lightly, satisfied he had her smiling again, and made up for his off-hand komen when they had come out of school.
“Bye, Blair.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Blair!”
Just like the morning, when Kati and Is had beckoned her, Eleanor was now calling her to the sitting area in the same way.
She checked her hair and clothes in the mirror, and straightened everything to make sure it was perfect.
“Coming, mother!”
Satisfied, just, she entered and faced her mother.
“You look tired.” Her mother cut her off, before she could say anything. “And don’t wear that kot anymore, it looks like it’s stretched around the waist. The Yves Saint Lauren navy one is much lebih elegant, lebih ladylike.”
Blair nodded, numbly.
She had only bought the navy jaket she was wearing now last night, and liked it.
It had been one of her kegemaran purchases.
“We’ll put that one in the charity closet, for Christmas… what was I thinking buying anda that one?… You’ll wear the YSL one tomorrow, but with what else…?”
Eleanor continued talking to her.
Muttering to herself.
Blair just looked down, studying the flooring.
The marble had a very interesting pattern.
Natural perfection, like Serena.
Blair rubbed her head. She shouldn’t have started thinking about Serena again.
Even though Serena had seemed to have stopped talking to her, she was so worried.
“Are anda listening to me?”
Blair’s head snapped up, and she shook her head apologetically.
“I’m sorry. I’m tired, it was a long day.”
Eleanor stared at her sharply.
“More like a long night. I could tell from looking at anda that anda weren’t in katil sejak ten. They do call it beauty sleep.”
“I’m sorry.” Blair whispered.
“Good. You’ll go to katil straight after makan malam, majlis makan malam tonight.” Another sidelong look, Eleanor had been giving her lots of them recently. “Before dessert.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blair sat on her katil after her dessert-free dinner.
She looked down at her nightgown, at the way it rested on her stomach.
It didn’t look how she had always remembered.
She was going to have to stop eating Pencuci Mulut every night.
She had to be perfect.
Like Serena, and her mother.
Her mother.
Just like Blair wasn’t speaking to Serena, she didn’t think her mother was speaking to her daddy.
Finally, he was home.
For dessert.
Blair had wanted to speak to him, but she had been sent upstairs.
He had telah diberi her a hug, called her Blair-Bear, and then tucked her into bed.
She liked it when he did that, and normally went straight to sleep.
Except tonight, after her dad went back downstairs, and she had heard him and her mom.
Talking.
Shouting.
She had gotten out from under her comforter, and sat on the middle of her bed.
She didn’t want to listen, but at the same time, didn’t want to not know what was happening.
The penthouse was large, she couldn’t hear everything. Only snatches, when their voices got louder.
“Business trip, pleasure trip.”
“Model.”
“Cheating.”
Blair really didn’t want to hear anymore after that.
Her dad would never do what she was scared Nate would.
He wouldn’t.
She refused to believe anything else.
Her family was perfect.
She ran into her bathroom, and shut the door to block out their voices, closing her eyes.
Her bathroom was cool, and delicate, serene.
Serene.
Serena.
Blair had her cell phone in her hand, she wanted to call Serena.
Serena would know what to do, what to say. She always did. Her mom had been in and out, up and down, enough times.
But Serena wasn’t talking to her.
The voices were louder; she could hear them in her bathroom now.
Two tears tracked down her cheeks.
Everything was so out of control.
So imperfect.
She just didn’t know what to do.
Blair stared around her bathroom, looking for something, anything that looked safe, secure, and controllable.
Before she knew it, she was somewhere she had never thought she would be, where she had promised she would never be.
On her knees.
Lifting the lid.
Her toothbrush held with handle up.
Taking a deep breath, she felt the smooth plastic enter her mouth, and touch her throat.
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To be continued...
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A/N:Not written sejak me.Just found it on Fanfiction.Net and loved it!Hope anda do too!Enjoy
XOXO
~Abby
