A/N: This is a very dark story - read at your own risk :P It's about two girls, lesbian, one's insane. It's slightly intense but not descriptive; I'd give it a rating of T I suppose.
“I don’t care.” Her words, though berkata quietly, shook with hidden anger. “I honestly don’t care.”
“Yes anda do,” I whispered. “You care a lot. anda care lebih than anda want to. And that’s why you’re lying.”
“I. Do. Not. Care.” She gritted her teeth together, glaring at me.
“Lies,” I said, loudly and clearly this time, knowing she was going to go into a rage soon. “You’re frustrated, you’re annoyed, and anda think life is worthless, hard, painful... anda care a lot.”
I was right; she went into a rage and she screamed, “I SWEAR I HATE YOU!”
I watched her as she started to destroy the small objects littered around us; the rain poured hard outside, darkening everything. “You don’t.” My calm voice hid my internal anger, like it always did.
And now, really, her anger got the best of her. It seemed to fill the room, shrinking everything; heating the place, too; like a monster trying to claw its way out of this small room. She threw herself at me, and she punched me, hard, on my arm – I felt blood pouring out and I felt a little dizzy, but I did not look at it and I did not react.
Instead, I watched her. Her eyes glinted madly and there was hatred in her face; she was glaring at me, completely deranged. Her goal was to unhinge me, I knew that from experience, but still I did not flinch, I refused to give her any sign that she had unnerved me. Her hand reached into her pocket and I closed my eyes. I didn’t have to watch this, I knew what would happen next; I had seen it happening enough times to have it memorized, to play inside my mind.
From her pocket she drew a long, silver blade. She was whispering something, and I tried to block it out, I tried to struggle, fight against the reaction she wanted, but it was always the same. My eyes flew open and I yelled, “NO!” just as she placed the tip of the blade on her wrist.
As I watched, a long, red line appeared from it and I screamed, feeling the world slipping away from me, feeling my sanity slipping away from me. My hati, tengah-tengah beat louder, faster, sending adrenaline through me as she laughed, pleased with the pain I was in. “Please, please, please,” I begged, but it only made her laugh harder.
My arm was hurting, too, but I was oblivious to my own pain as I watched the blood seeping out of her wrist. Instantly, I was sejak her side, trying to stop the flow, as I always did, and she whispered, “It’s no use darlin’. . . . Don’t waste your time. . . .”
“Shut up,” I said, tears flowing down my face freely, “shut up. . . .”
Her laugh echoed in the room, mad as ever; the world spun around me. She grabbed my arm harshly and I almost let out a gasp, but just managed to restrain myself. Shoving me, hard, she leaned close to me, as I was on the floor, and she leered, “Why do anda even try?”
I could see her madness in her eyes; I could feel my hati, tengah-tengah breaking, my mind failing to come up with an answer. My breath was short and shallow; I felt her weight on me. My entire world spun around this one girl, this one girl who was poison in my veins, who was the extinguisher of hope, the one who brought pain and misery into my life. I couldn’t let her go.
Her grip on my arm was far too painful now; a sickening pain, but I loved it. She stared down at me, on bahagian, atas of me; her black eyes glinting in a way that I had never seen before.
And before I knew what was going to happen, before I could contemplate the pain, her lips were on mine.
It was everything I had dreamed about, but nothing like my dreams. In those, this Ciuman would have been peaceful, it would have been after I had made her better, but the reality was harsh and cruel and dark like it always was with us.
She was Ciuman me almost too forcefully, I let out a moan and she pressed harder on me. My arm slipped around her waist, holding her tight to me. Her hands reached down and unbuttoned my shirt, and in a matter of moments all our clothes were off; her bare body was against mine and she traced her lips down my neck and kissed me hard, thrusting against me, and I groaned again, hating it but loving it. Her leg slipped between mine, she kissed me even harder; I could feel the heat and I loved it. This impure moment with her, I loved it; and finally her hand slipped between my legs and I moaned. . . .
It was over too soon: she was panting when she got up and she reached for her clothes, but I grabbed her with my good arm and kissed her again. She pressed herself against me but I pushed her back and we toppled over; Ciuman her deeply, I reached down and elicited a soft, barely audible groan from her. I kissed her harder and I moved my lips to her breast; trying to please her, and finally, she screamed loudly, as I pushed myself inside her, it was delightful, guilty, simply just so amazing. I kissed her breast and she moaned but grabbed me sejak my hair and pulled me back to her lips; we Lost ourselves in the moment; and I forgot about the blood around me, around her, I forgot about how deranged she was, I forgot about the madness – it all slipped away from me and I was lebih than happy to let it go.
But then she got up, and it was as if nothing that happened: the expression in her eyes stayed the same as before and she slipped into her clothes. Anger was radiating from her again, crushing me lebih than ever before. I felt a chill go down my spine and I pulled on my own clothes in silence. When I turned around to face her, I found she was staring at me; and I flushed.
Then she crossed the room in a few strides and kissed me again, placing both her hands on my face – it was light and lebih innocent than anything she had ever done. I was surprised; I kissed her back, lightly. In a strangled sort of voice, she whispered, “I’ll fight this – this demon. Please, d-don’t – don’t go.”
Numbly, I nodded, and she burst into tears. I could only embrace her; and she cried into me, occasionally still trying to find something to hurt someone with, but she had dropped her pisau before. “I HATE THIS!” she suddenly screamed, tears around us. “I HATE – I HATE LIFE!” She pulled her hair and screamed as the rain poured outside while we stood in a pool of our own blood and tears.
“Please, calm down,” I whispered, but she just broke down completely. My hati, tengah-tengah broke seeing her cry, and I held her tight to me.
We’re both insane, I thought. We’re both insane, crazy, deranged, broken people. She berkata she will fight. She’s going to fight. Oh, please let this be okay, please let her get better, please let this pain, this fucking pain, please just let it end! I berkata silently in my head, my only plea for help. Our blood, tears, and sweat soaked into my clothes and I shivered, the room spinning in front of my eyes, slipping into blackness. I blinked hard but the darkness just got stronger; it was as though my mind was slipping out of my fingers, I couldn’t concentrate, I couldn’t see, I couldn’t feel, my eyes were getting heavier, all my senses were decreasing...
Am I. . . ?
A fork of lightning illuminated her face before the clap of thunder brought on an irresistible darkness. I couldn’t fight it if I tried, so I didn’t. I let it overwhelm me, taking over my senses. She had stopped crying before; she was quiet, almost lifeless in my arms. The darkness swooped over me and everything slipped away as I embraced nothingness.
Goodbye. . . .
~When the police came to investigate, they found two girls wrapped in each others’ arms, dead. It was mysterious and dark – the small town talked about it for years.~
And as usual... Feedback, please! Any and all komen-komen appreciated :)
“I don’t care.” Her words, though berkata quietly, shook with hidden anger. “I honestly don’t care.”
“Yes anda do,” I whispered. “You care a lot. anda care lebih than anda want to. And that’s why you’re lying.”
“I. Do. Not. Care.” She gritted her teeth together, glaring at me.
“Lies,” I said, loudly and clearly this time, knowing she was going to go into a rage soon. “You’re frustrated, you’re annoyed, and anda think life is worthless, hard, painful... anda care a lot.”
I was right; she went into a rage and she screamed, “I SWEAR I HATE YOU!”
I watched her as she started to destroy the small objects littered around us; the rain poured hard outside, darkening everything. “You don’t.” My calm voice hid my internal anger, like it always did.
And now, really, her anger got the best of her. It seemed to fill the room, shrinking everything; heating the place, too; like a monster trying to claw its way out of this small room. She threw herself at me, and she punched me, hard, on my arm – I felt blood pouring out and I felt a little dizzy, but I did not look at it and I did not react.
Instead, I watched her. Her eyes glinted madly and there was hatred in her face; she was glaring at me, completely deranged. Her goal was to unhinge me, I knew that from experience, but still I did not flinch, I refused to give her any sign that she had unnerved me. Her hand reached into her pocket and I closed my eyes. I didn’t have to watch this, I knew what would happen next; I had seen it happening enough times to have it memorized, to play inside my mind.
From her pocket she drew a long, silver blade. She was whispering something, and I tried to block it out, I tried to struggle, fight against the reaction she wanted, but it was always the same. My eyes flew open and I yelled, “NO!” just as she placed the tip of the blade on her wrist.
As I watched, a long, red line appeared from it and I screamed, feeling the world slipping away from me, feeling my sanity slipping away from me. My hati, tengah-tengah beat louder, faster, sending adrenaline through me as she laughed, pleased with the pain I was in. “Please, please, please,” I begged, but it only made her laugh harder.
My arm was hurting, too, but I was oblivious to my own pain as I watched the blood seeping out of her wrist. Instantly, I was sejak her side, trying to stop the flow, as I always did, and she whispered, “It’s no use darlin’. . . . Don’t waste your time. . . .”
“Shut up,” I said, tears flowing down my face freely, “shut up. . . .”
Her laugh echoed in the room, mad as ever; the world spun around me. She grabbed my arm harshly and I almost let out a gasp, but just managed to restrain myself. Shoving me, hard, she leaned close to me, as I was on the floor, and she leered, “Why do anda even try?”
I could see her madness in her eyes; I could feel my hati, tengah-tengah breaking, my mind failing to come up with an answer. My breath was short and shallow; I felt her weight on me. My entire world spun around this one girl, this one girl who was poison in my veins, who was the extinguisher of hope, the one who brought pain and misery into my life. I couldn’t let her go.
Her grip on my arm was far too painful now; a sickening pain, but I loved it. She stared down at me, on bahagian, atas of me; her black eyes glinting in a way that I had never seen before.
And before I knew what was going to happen, before I could contemplate the pain, her lips were on mine.
It was everything I had dreamed about, but nothing like my dreams. In those, this Ciuman would have been peaceful, it would have been after I had made her better, but the reality was harsh and cruel and dark like it always was with us.
She was Ciuman me almost too forcefully, I let out a moan and she pressed harder on me. My arm slipped around her waist, holding her tight to me. Her hands reached down and unbuttoned my shirt, and in a matter of moments all our clothes were off; her bare body was against mine and she traced her lips down my neck and kissed me hard, thrusting against me, and I groaned again, hating it but loving it. Her leg slipped between mine, she kissed me even harder; I could feel the heat and I loved it. This impure moment with her, I loved it; and finally her hand slipped between my legs and I moaned. . . .
It was over too soon: she was panting when she got up and she reached for her clothes, but I grabbed her with my good arm and kissed her again. She pressed herself against me but I pushed her back and we toppled over; Ciuman her deeply, I reached down and elicited a soft, barely audible groan from her. I kissed her harder and I moved my lips to her breast; trying to please her, and finally, she screamed loudly, as I pushed myself inside her, it was delightful, guilty, simply just so amazing. I kissed her breast and she moaned but grabbed me sejak my hair and pulled me back to her lips; we Lost ourselves in the moment; and I forgot about the blood around me, around her, I forgot about how deranged she was, I forgot about the madness – it all slipped away from me and I was lebih than happy to let it go.
But then she got up, and it was as if nothing that happened: the expression in her eyes stayed the same as before and she slipped into her clothes. Anger was radiating from her again, crushing me lebih than ever before. I felt a chill go down my spine and I pulled on my own clothes in silence. When I turned around to face her, I found she was staring at me; and I flushed.
Then she crossed the room in a few strides and kissed me again, placing both her hands on my face – it was light and lebih innocent than anything she had ever done. I was surprised; I kissed her back, lightly. In a strangled sort of voice, she whispered, “I’ll fight this – this demon. Please, d-don’t – don’t go.”
Numbly, I nodded, and she burst into tears. I could only embrace her; and she cried into me, occasionally still trying to find something to hurt someone with, but she had dropped her pisau before. “I HATE THIS!” she suddenly screamed, tears around us. “I HATE – I HATE LIFE!” She pulled her hair and screamed as the rain poured outside while we stood in a pool of our own blood and tears.
“Please, calm down,” I whispered, but she just broke down completely. My hati, tengah-tengah broke seeing her cry, and I held her tight to me.
We’re both insane, I thought. We’re both insane, crazy, deranged, broken people. She berkata she will fight. She’s going to fight. Oh, please let this be okay, please let her get better, please let this pain, this fucking pain, please just let it end! I berkata silently in my head, my only plea for help. Our blood, tears, and sweat soaked into my clothes and I shivered, the room spinning in front of my eyes, slipping into blackness. I blinked hard but the darkness just got stronger; it was as though my mind was slipping out of my fingers, I couldn’t concentrate, I couldn’t see, I couldn’t feel, my eyes were getting heavier, all my senses were decreasing...
Am I. . . ?
A fork of lightning illuminated her face before the clap of thunder brought on an irresistible darkness. I couldn’t fight it if I tried, so I didn’t. I let it overwhelm me, taking over my senses. She had stopped crying before; she was quiet, almost lifeless in my arms. The darkness swooped over me and everything slipped away as I embraced nothingness.
Goodbye. . . .
~When the police came to investigate, they found two girls wrapped in each others’ arms, dead. It was mysterious and dark – the small town talked about it for years.~
And as usual... Feedback, please! Any and all komen-komen appreciated :)
