anda need to do what anda need to do too. If anda need to transition, transition. I am trying to do the same as well despite my family. My mother called a mental asylum and told them that she wanted to admit me for being "delusional". The last time I confronted them about this my mother dragged me to her preacher and forced me to relearn about what God will do to me and my dad ripped apart his truck so he could make me rebuild it sejak myself since that's what "a man does." I had no other option. I was going to shoot myself in the face if I stayed with them any longer than I had to. This is a small part of the frustration with my parents, who refuse to see me as who I am.
And yet, there are many dreams that I have about being a cis woman. I remembered wishing that I was able to have the right puberty when I was young instead of the one I got. I hurt so bad when I was changing. My body was getting thicker, I was growing hair all over my body. It was so awkward for me. When my voice was changing, I cried because I didn't want it to get deeper.
It was a struggle to deal with my body and to this day, it is. I shave every other hari because my hair grows back so fast and so pointy that it rips up my skin, leaving tons of spots that I can't get rid of. Some day, I hope that I can start hormones and start feminizing my body as my brain intended. I also know that I will want surgery to fix what is wrong as well. While it will be wonderful to finally become the woman I was meant to be, I know that one dream is out of reach.
My dream of carrying my own child seems impossible. I often cry because it feels like the angkasa required to hold a child is too full. It should be empty so I can have the proper angkasa to hold my little ones. Often times, I imagine I have one and it makes me temporarily happy. To have a phantom womb is not enough, because I want to say that I am a ciswoman, and then I wake up and I'm not! Perhaps someday soon, science will create a womb which will enable me to realize this dream. But for now, I want to take this one step at a time. One day, I will wake up and at least say that I am a mostly physical woman and that gives me lebih hope than anything else.
And yet, there are many dreams that I have about being a cis woman. I remembered wishing that I was able to have the right puberty when I was young instead of the one I got. I hurt so bad when I was changing. My body was getting thicker, I was growing hair all over my body. It was so awkward for me. When my voice was changing, I cried because I didn't want it to get deeper.
It was a struggle to deal with my body and to this day, it is. I shave every other hari because my hair grows back so fast and so pointy that it rips up my skin, leaving tons of spots that I can't get rid of. Some day, I hope that I can start hormones and start feminizing my body as my brain intended. I also know that I will want surgery to fix what is wrong as well. While it will be wonderful to finally become the woman I was meant to be, I know that one dream is out of reach.
My dream of carrying my own child seems impossible. I often cry because it feels like the angkasa required to hold a child is too full. It should be empty so I can have the proper angkasa to hold my little ones. Often times, I imagine I have one and it makes me temporarily happy. To have a phantom womb is not enough, because I want to say that I am a ciswoman, and then I wake up and I'm not! Perhaps someday soon, science will create a womb which will enable me to realize this dream. But for now, I want to take this one step at a time. One day, I will wake up and at least say that I am a mostly physical woman and that gives me lebih hope than anything else.
So I had a horrible time on trimet today. Went to do my unemployment and ended up not going to do it because someone decided to "prove" i was male and was getting exceedingly dangerous and angry as the saat ticked. eventually he was shouting at me to drop my pants. I was crying sejak that point. And trimet officials came on to check tickets when they saw the event happening. grabbing the man they got him away from me and after explaining the situation they took him off the train and one of them rode the train on my way back making sure no one bothered me until I got off. but still that was not fun. and I think I'll avoid trimet as much as possible.