Dreams

Jackson kissed my forehead, my nose, my cheek. He travelled along my jaw before planting a rough Ciuman on my lips. In his Ciuman i could feel the passion, desire, longing and carefulness. He desire matched mine, we both wished to be able to do lebih than this. But we couldn’t, i was fragile, breakable and non- refundable. One flinch, one face, one anything and he pulled away and my body filled with chagrin. I hated the line that was drawn between us and stopped him from menunjukkan his Cinta for me and stopped me from experiencing the real him.

He kissed my eyelids making me close them as he planted another Ciuman on my lips. His lips parted and my body shivered. This was over that line for him but i didn’t care, he would pull away soon enough. His hands travelled down my arms, fingertips traced over my breast and my abdomen. He gripped my leg and wrapped it around his hip. My eyes opened in shock, this was definitely over that line, but again i didn’t care. I could feel my lips starting to swell from our kisses. Jackson kissed the hollow of my neck and he paused, he dihidu, smelt the air and his eyes widen and his lips parted wider, revealing his sharp and silver teeth. I knew what the silver meant, it was his venom, and his eyes were tinged red. His grip tightened on my wrist, so much that it hurt.
“Jackson my wrists... ow, let go” i complained trying to pull my wrists from his grip. His faced inched closer to my neck. A drop of silver landed on my throat and with that Jackson teeth sunk into my neck, i screamed, Jackson blinked suddenly realising what he was doing, but unable to stop. Lenete ran into the room, trying her hardest to push her brother off of me. A sudden chill went up my spine, i could feel it i my chest. Lenete screamed Lilly’s name. Lilly and Nafron ran into the room, my body went limp from the lose of blood and my senses went numb.

How could the best moment of my life turn into this freezing pain i was going through? My fingertips were freezing everything was frozen. To cold for my comfort, even colder, I screamed as Lenete tried to calm me but it was no use. My body jerked and the chill got colder. I felt something on my neck. The chill was gradually disappearing.
“It’s okay Dis” Lenete whispered in my ear as the chill left my ankles and wrists.
“Dis I'm sorry, i should have... I’m sorry”

I woke screaming into my pillow.
“Dis I’m sorry about that i truly am” Jackson whispered. I felt sorry for him, my hands cupped my throat i felt the slight bump from his bite. His head fell into his hands and i merpati out of my bed, running to him and wrapped my arms around him.
“Its okay, it’s not your fault” i whispered
“Don’t anda see” he stood up and he pushed me away “it is my fault, if i wasn’t this” he motioned to himself “if i wasn’t this monster” He sat back down and i cautiously walked over to him.
“If anda weren’t this, anda wouldn’t be with me and i wouldn’t be with you”
“How can anda Cinta this monster? I can’t even touch anda without hurting you, we can’t do anything because of what i am”
“You are what anda are, No changing it, But i don’t Cinta what anda are, I Cinta who anda are” I put my shaking hands either side of face and kissed his forehead “ i Cinta anda Jackson, the past is the past, no changing that, I'm not sorry anda did it to me, i mean come on now I'm special i have a tiny bit of vampire in me, Stop sitting in your sorrows and believe me when i say I'm not sorry” i kissed him again and we looked into each others eyes until he pulled me onto his lap “I Cinta anda monster” he chuckled and kissed me . We sat there in silence staring into the depths of each others eyes.
“Daisi, Jackson, Heidi, Isabella Breakfast”
“Stupid blonde” i muttered and she hissed “I Cinta anda Lenny” I smiled as she chuckled and i took Jackson’s hand in mine “come on”

* * *

The car was packed for the trip home. Jackson’s face of distress was still behind my eyelids. He never let me go once after my dream. Erika had been in an extremely good mood since my dream and i knew why. My head rested on Jackson shoulder, he was colder which meant he hadn’t hunted in a while. I looked up at him
“as soon as we get utama your hunting” i spoke to him softly still scared he might react the way he did no less than three hours ago. He shivered; he hadn’t hunted for a long time if he was shivering “Jackson! anda will hunt” i ordered him.
“But i can’t leave you” he berkata almost like a child without his blanket
“The hell anda can, look I’ll stay with Heidi atau who ever doesn’t go okay, anda are going hunting and that’s that”
“It’s true Jackson, anda need to go; Heidi went last night she’ll stay with Dis, anda will go Jackson, everyone else in this family can protect just as much as anda can”
“But—” Jackson started
“No!” we all screamed at him at once
“You will go, don’t make me have Dimytri drag anda out, not that he’ll be able to but I’ll try, anda will go” a violent tremor went through Jackson’s body and i hugged him closer to him
“Okay I’ll go” i kissed his neck and rested my head back on his shoulder.

The tyres squealed as we turned onto the Greene's driveway, the car twisted and turned down the driveway. The car pulled to a halt and Jackson pulled me out of the car. He set me on my feet and kissed me, i slid my hands over his shoulders. He pulled me up to his height sejak wrapping his arms around my waist. His Ciuman was passionate and longing.
“Um, Jackson I’m the one who has to stay with her when anda and everyone else leave, i would prefer her to be able to walk on her own” Heidi complained and laughed. I had never heard her laugh before; her laugh was heavenly, like angels. Jackson’s lips parted slightly and i shivered. I felt hands on my waist and Jackson lips disappeared
“Hay!” i complained as i went sailing for one set of arms to the next. I ended up in Isabella’s arms, i was being held tightly into her chest and Dimytri was crouched protectively in front of us, Lenete had thrown her arms around her brother and other family members were trying to pull him away from me.
“What’s wrong” i whimpered as i saw Jackson being pulled away from me.
“Jackson hasn’t hunted, that’s what’s wrong” Isabella patted my shoulder as i struggled to free myself from her and get to Jackson. Erika suddenly stood in front of us
“It’s okay Daisi, he won’t hurt you” her voice was so annoying i felt like ripping her throat out. We all heard a shrill laugh from in the forest, i recognized the laugh it was Lenete. She must have heard my komen on Erika. I laughed as well. Heidi pushed Erika out of her way and took me in her arms.
“Go” was the only word she berkata before she took me inside “stupid vampire needs to learn manners” she laughed
“Who?” I asked her as she walked around the lounge room putting on music. After the first few lines i recognized the song it was my favourite song as well –sing for absolution sejak muse. Heidi danced into the dapur and danced back handing me a plate and flopping into the lounge seterusnya to me.
“Erika, she needs to learn manners” Heidi smiled and began eating
“Oh, she does doesn’t she”
“Well i guess it’s how anda look at it because she walked up to anda when anda were talking to Isabella, she interrupted anda and then told anda Jackson wouldn’t hurt you, but judging sejak the look on her face, she is the one the made Jackson remember the first time he attacked anda and making him thirstier, god i hope anda understood that” she smiled
“Yes i did, i had to learn how to understand your old fashion talk, it’s quite easy actually” i shoved a fork full of Makanan into my mouth, Heidi smiled and looked at me. We both dissolved into a fit of laughter.
“How many family stories have anda heard?” Heidi asked when she stopped laughing.
“Oh um only Jackson’s and Lenny’s, I’ve been to intimidated to ask anyone else”
“Would anda like to hear mine?” Heidi asked me, her face fell i could tell her story might not be happy but i nodded any way.
“well i was born, anda know that don’t you” she looked at me and i nodded i did know that “ well Dimytri is like seven saat older than me, he is the one that ripped our mothers stomach open so we could be born. The first image i can remember is of my father holding me; he kissed my forehead and bit my mother a total of 13 time so she would turn, Father left mother for a total of three saat the entire time she was screaming and that was only to get my brother and I blood, we confused him the entire time he tried to feed us” she took a breath in and looked at me “ I bit my mother and my venom its... its different to every other vampires, instead of her feeling Frozen she felt like she was being burnt from the inside out but really she was changing she changed faster than Father did, all because of my venom, see if I bit you, anda would feel like anda were burning, but if anyone else bit you, anda would feel like anda were freezing from the inside out. And so we sat... well my brother sat, i was cradled. Dimytri grew rapidly, you’ve seen him now, he was that size after about a year. I on the other hand grew at human rate; it took me sixteen years to look like i do now. That’s the same for all of the other half-halves. Girls are venomous, need human blood, we cannot make do with animal blood, therefore our eye colour is brighter than the boys, our lips colour is brighter than other vampires, our skin is paler and we grow at a human rate while boys grow at a rate that is at least ten times our rate” she laughed uneasily and wiped a tear from her face “oh we can cry boys cannot. When we mature we are Frozen in that state that applies to both genders. So no babies... nothing, kinda sad if anda think about it” she stood up taking both plates to the dapur and walking back.
“so we waited for mother to open her eyes, father was so happy when she did, we went hunting, Dimytri didn’t hunt he climbed a pokok even though he was only two days old, father had to kill my human for me i was to little, not much happened until i matured, we basically continued life as normal, i watched my brother mature quickly. Father travelled in cari of lebih Half-Halves we found them and we found out why Dimytri didn’t kill people, why i wasn’t maturing as fast. Basically all our worries were answered. Dimytri and i would live forever along side them and they wouldn’t have to grieve for their children” Heidi looked at me with red eyes and grimaced “ i matured in July of 1749 and i ah... i left my family, i fell in ‘love” her tongue rolled around the word and her face twisted “ atau what i thought was love.” She laughed again lebih uneasy than before. It was at this point that i realised my mouth was hanging open and i closed it and shifted my position so i could see her better
“What happened?” this time i really wanted to know she seemed so depressed and unloved.
“I met a nice young man, atau at least i thought he was nice when we met. We went to school together; we were what anda call now high school sweet hearts, we were in the same classes and wanted to be the same thing when we left school. Now don’t laugh but he, Franz Benedict wanted to be a Doctor” she rolled her eyes and blew a raspberry, raspberi “so because i was stupid, naive and stubborn i studied to be his nurse, we were in love, people in the jalan turned their heads when we walked past hand in hand, barely leaving each others sides, his parent’s didn’t approve of me, thus mine didn’t of him, so we left, we ran away, i was ‘18’ atau so he thought and he was 19, we walked most of the way to what is now referred to as Florida, Franz applied at the local hospital, they were short on staff and he had a job within two hours of applying, i was his runaway bride” Heidi looked at the ceiling and a droplet fell off her chin and landed on her jeans “ he earned a lot, within another three months we had our own house, i had pretty dresses and maids and oh... all the glorious things that other girls could only dream of having. On some occasions i would go to work with him. I looked after the sick and the dying; i handled the blood, very well for someone of my vampire age. When Franz was sleeping i would run back to the hospital and drain the blood of those who had died over night. It made me sick for a couple of hours, but it was a small price to pay. Everything was going fine, until along came the new nurse, Mary her name was and she was pretty there’s no denying that, Franz worked with her along side him while i watched from the sidelines for a whole month, Franz had earned a hari off, on my way out i knocked on his door and he put his book down to Ciuman me like every other morning and i walked off to work. Mary was there; she spent the whole hari with me. She asked me to go shopping with her that afternoon, she would meet me right after work and we would walk to the dressmakers down the road i agreed. I berkata goodbye to her as we went our separate ways for the afternoon shifts. This time i struggled through my shift, the blood was stronger in the air, there was a major accident and the corpses were coming into the hospital sejak the horse and cart, troli full. Franz usually came to the hospital in situations like this, to lend a hand so to speak” Her face went paler in the light and an evil glare was in her eyes, i shifted my weight again preparing myself to run if necessary.
“he wasn’t there that day, i told my self it was nothing, he had earned a hari off and he was using it wisely. I let myself off work early and as i sat out the front of the hospital waiting for Mary’s shift to end i considered my options of why Franz didn’t come down to help. I didn’t come up with much, all i ended up with was he was using his hari wisely. The time came for Mary’s shift to end and i waited, she never came so i walked down to the dressmakers on my own, maybe she left early as well because of the blood. I walked into the kedai and the loceng jingled, Elizabeth the dressmaker walked out from the back room. I asked her if she had seen Mary she shook her head and walked back behind the counter and i started for home. The gas lamps were on in our front yard which meant that Franz was home. I pulled off my overcoat and hung it on the rack. I called his name and only received the sound of shuffling for upstairs. I heard Mary’s panic and her confusion on how she had told me to wait for her and why was i home. I raced upstairs at vampire speed. She was still gathering her clothes as i opened the door and he was relaxed until i locked the door, maybe he thought i wouldn’t atau couldn’t hurt him, boy was he wrong.” She smiled “ Two days later i was being conference sejak the police because i was the one who ‘walked in to my bedroom with two dead work colleagues on my floor’ i was stupid yes dumb no, i had step up their bodies to make it seem like she killed him and then killed her self. I was let go from the station and i ran home, my real home, with mother and father, i decided not to tell them the real reason why i had returned instead i told them he asked me to marry him and i gently turned him down for his own safety. I didn’t cry, i needn’t cry, he brought his death onto himself, claiming he loved me then loving someone else. And i haven’t found anyone else to Cinta seen, whether i’m not looking hard enough atau i’m just not meant to have some i don’t know” She exhaled loudly and ran a tissue under her eyes, she looked at me and i could see the tear streaks from her mascara and the redness around her eyes.
“Should have worn water-proof mascara” i laughed, and she chuckled. I hugged her letting her ruin my baju i didn’t mind but Lenete will “well I'll always be here for anda Heidi, i mean your going to be my sister soon” i smiled
“You don’t know what that’s like Dis, Jackson loves you, we all do, we all Cinta you, like anda Cinta all of us but he is in Cinta with you, he spent 3 and a half centuries alone and then he found anda and he changed. we spent a whole six months listening to him fight with Lenete over you, he really means it when he tells anda he loves you, that’s why he proposed to anda and that’s why he hasn’t left your side even with all these things that Erika is doing to you. anda should have seen him that time anda fractured your wrist when anda were out. He was practically screaming out things for people to do, he never left your side, he was so worried that he would have to change you, and anda know how he feels about that right now”
“Yes i do know how he feels but I’m a little stumped on his reasons though, he has never once told me why he won’t change me” i laughed
“Oh i know why he won’t” she grinned my face fell “He values anda to much as anda are now, he doesn’t want to lose anda in this hell” she laughed
“He values me?” i was confused he had never told me this.
“Yes he wants to see anda achieve things in life before he um... removes the dice anda need to play the game of your life.”
“What?” i laughed
“He wants anda to be able to look back on your achievements when you’re a vampire so he wants anda to achieve things before he pauses your life” Heidi explained with a smile on her face.
“I never really thought of that” i mumbled Heidi laughed
“Come on I’ll help anda study for your finals” she smiled. Damn, Finals i completely forgot, Heidi picked me up and carried me up to my room.

* * *

Two hours later i had crammed, like anda would not believe, Heidi studied with me tutoring me; i managed to cram for 3 of my subjects. I had a good feeling about my mathematics segment, not so sure about History and Financial studies. Heidi and i were eating when Jackson came screaming into the dapur picked me up and kissed me and raced me upstairs, throwing me onto the bed. He hovered over me; his eyes a lovely purple, the purple i was used to and loved.
“Hi” i berkata breathlessly, he smiled and kissed me.
“Worst three hours of my life” he berkata between kisses.
“Not so much for me, i listened to Heidi’s story, quite sad actually, i hope anda don’t do that to me” i glared at him he kissed the hollow of my neck.
“I could never dream of doing that to you... well technically i can’t dream of doing it so, never in my wildest thoughts would i think of doing that to anda Miss Hethford” he kissed me again. There was a knock on the door, Jackson fell to my side and groaned.
“What would anda like Erika?” he berkata clearly annoyed, i heard nothing obviously she was speaking to fast and softly for me. I leaped out of the katil and grabbed a pen and paper, i wrote only one word in my messy hand Penulisan

Clearing?

He looked at the paper even before i was near the bed, he smiled and nodded, he picked me up and cradled me onto his back. I heard one last call of ‘Jackson?’ before he leaped off our balcony and ran. He ran faster this time because he had just hunted and we arrived at the clearing in no time Jackson pulled me to the ground and i fell with and oof. I laughed as i pulled a thorn out of my arm.
“So, your little mind tells me anda have a tarikh set, can i know what it is please?” i felt his lips moving against the skin of my neck. The tarikh was stuck in my mind and there was no avoiding it.
“Six months before my 20th, which is the 31st January seterusnya year” i smiled
“Why then?” i laughed out loud
“I thought anda would already know that? Well here anda are stuck in your 18 tahun old perfectness and I’m getting uglier sejak the –”
“Excuse me... Uglier? How dare anda think yourself like that” he glared at me
“Fine... I’m getting... older sejak the saat and i don’t think you’ll Cinta me when I'm old so i want to be changed” i smiled against his skin.
“wait anda think” he put a finger under my chin and made me look at him “that i won’t Cinta anda when anda get old?”
“Oh and Wrinkly” i laughed
“Silly Woman” he smiled and laughed. We sat in silence for about an jam until Jackson growled.
“Heidi, anda know that could have waited” Jackson berkata quietly
“Yes i know but i need to warn her, it’s important”
“Tell me what” i interrupted
“It’s Erika, she’s gone”
“Gone what do anda mean gone?”
“She left, just after anda came here, that’s what she wanted to tell anda Jackson, that she was going”
“You mean she won’t hurt me anymore?” no one answered instead i was slung onto Heidi’s back and we were heading back to the house.
“Where’s Jackson?” i screamed into her ear forgetting about her vampire hearing “oops sorry”
“he went to Erika, she didn’t leave she passed sejak when anda asked if she could still hurt you” we both went silent as Heidi ran back to the house. She called Lilly when we stepped foot on to the patio. I saw Lilly and Heidi threw me to her and took off after Jackson.
“This might be bad, Lenete here take Daisi and Study for finals”
“Yes, Come on Dis” Lenete took my off Lilly and carried me up stairs
“You do know with everyone carrying me I’m bound to lose the use of my legs” i laughed as Lenete dropped our buku on the meja, jadual in front of us.