so i know nobody comes on here anymore but i figured i'd do what jacob suggested (kind of bc this artikel is only about me lol)

so i'm gonna be a junior in high school this tahun (pretty rough) and i'm already looking into colleges (not so fun)

i've made some pretty amazing Friends and i wouldn't trade them for the world (although i want to kill them sometimes bc ALL THEY DO IS SING)

i really, really Cinta one direction. please don't judge me omg it's not just their Muzik that made me Cinta them i mean i'm really in Cinta with them as people as well. they're amazing guys. i also Cinta 5 saat of summer, an australian pop punk band that opened for one direction's tour. i saw them both in konsert on july 6, 2013 and i loved every moment.

i saw darren criss in konsert on june 27, 2013 with two of my best Friends and it was one of the most amazing nights of my life!

i've grown up a lot since i left fanpop. like, a LOT. i've been looking back on my komen-komen on here and oh my GOD my typing was so horrendous i used the xD face every other word!

i'm totally in Cinta with jeremy shada, the voice actor for finn on adventure time! he's adorable and he's my age ;)

i went to england and france this past spring for two weeks with school, and it was so amazing! i loved every saat of it! i finally got to see London and paris :D

i don't know if any of anda remember, but i am a dancer and i switched to a professional-ish school (i guess?? it's not like american ballet theater level but it's up there!) and i've gotten really serious about ballet.

of course, i'm still head over heels in Cinta with queen. and obviously harry potter is still a huge huge part of my life. it always will be :)

so, the real reason i telah diposkan this artikel is because i have a confession. i have to rant.

the past few months, i have been struggling a lot with body image. i see myself as too fat, too awkward, too tall, and altogether too ugly. i hate the way i look so much and i can't take how miserable it's made me. i hate my personality, my voice, my face, my body, and my everything.

and i haven't ever even admitted this out loud yet, but i'm anorexic, and i am m i s e r a b 1 e. i'm always tired, crabby, and cold because of ana. i just don't know what to do anymore. days have become so long and repetitive and i'm just tired of life. i have self-harmed before, but don't worry about it. i don't do it much and haven't in a couple of months.

anda are the first people to know this (if anyone even comes on and sees this). nobody knows how unhappy i am and nobody knows about ana so i guess i hide it pretty okay. i really needed to get this out somewhere. i just don't want to be seen as attention-seeking so i'm sorry if i sound like an attention whore.

and pretty much darren criss and one direction have saved my life multiple times.

so..i miss anda guys. like a lot. i was so much happier when we were all together, but i think it's a good thing we went our separate ways. we all grew up. half of us are in college atau uni atau whatever. i'm not the same person i used to be, and i know the rest of anda probably aren't either. but i honestly hope you're all doing well. i Cinta anda guys always :)