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The room was filled with silence.
Except of the brawl of the water that was coming out of the pancuran, pancuran mandian head and the silent, halting sobbing seterusnya to it. And there on the floor was a squatted figure who had wrapped its arms around its knees and was rocking back and forth in a slow rhythm.
The figure lifted its head slowly and stared into space. The steam of the hot water had caused the dark brown waves to curl even more.
Tears kept on falling down the face and left their signs on it. The normally bluish-green, sort of turquoise eyes were now glimming in a soft green.
Absentminded and Lost in her own thoughts, Cuddy's arm found its way to her cheeks and wiped the tears away. Her brain told her to get up and leave as soon as possible but her body refused.
She leaned against the tiled dinding and realized with relief that her body slowly stopped shaking. Cuddy closed her eyes again and put her head back, not wanting to live through her whole thoughts and memories again.
This time it was her mind that declined to obey her. So all she had tried to repress the past days came back to her mind at once and hit her so suddenly and unprepared that she felt hot teardrops burning in her eyes again.
They ran down her tearstained face, stopped at her chin and fell down to the ground were they mingled with the water which was still coming out of the pancuran, pancuran mandian head and made its way to the plug hole.
She didn't know how long she had been sitting there but did it really matter? She had Lost track of time and she didn't care.
The shivering had started again and Cuddy felt her back hitting the dinding lightly. There was still a part inside her which put up resistance and wanted to stop immidiately.
But she had bottled up her emotions for too long and here in the pancuran, pancuran mandian she felt something like an oddly sense of freedom.
No one was watching her, no one could hear her and that made her feel save. And so she gave vent to her feelings for once and cried uncontrolledly.
She wrapped her arms around her knees again and put her forehead on them. The sound of the running water calmed her down and she started to rock backwards and forwards again.
Because of this she didn't hear how the door was opened and she didn't see a well known person entering the room and staring at the bundle in front of him.
At first House thought he had taken too much Vicodin but he soon realized that it had nothing to do with his painkillers and that he wasn't dreaming as well, but that it was Cuddy who was sitting there and who was crying like a child.
He wanted to say something but the words didn't leave his mouth, instead he opened his mouth just to close it again and stared at her with his piercing blue eyes.
House cleared his throat but the sound of the water was too loud and he had the feeling that he could have shouted without getting any reaction from Cuddy.
For a short moment he thought of turning around and leave again but he stayed where he was, unable to alih atau to think.
All of a sudden Cuddy had the hunch that something had changed and lifted her head gently.
House's eyes met with hers that were now shimming even more, still with the slight green touch.
He couldn't remember the last time he had seen her like that, she hadn't probably been like that before, not even when he had been at her house after the incident with the failed adoption.
Her eyes were filled with a mixture of emptiness, dizziness, resignation and bare pain.
She stared at him and he was sure she didn't realize that he was there.
House stared back, his eyes filled with confusion, curiosity, worry, insecurity and awkwardness.
Then after something that felt like an eternity, Cuddy's eyes widened in realization and she quickly averted them from his.
"What are anda doing here?"
she asked shakily, her voice not lebih than a whisper.
"I could ask anda the same"
he retored and kept staring at her.
His gaze made her feel uncomfortable and she felt her inside tensing up. Cuddy got up but she felt incredibly weak and needed to lean onto the dinding again.
To see her like that made him feel miserable but he knew she would have rejected any sort of comfort.
He had just caught her when she was feeling selamat, peti deposit keselamatan and had telah diberi vent to her emotions, something she never did.
And the fact that he had interrupted such an intimate moment of her just strengthened her resistance.
Both of them were very aware of that when their eyes met again. Though both of them wanted to avert them again they couldn't.
They were staring at each other and House felt the urgent need to Ciuman her again.
But before he could put his plan into action, she had turned her eyes away again and was staring at the ground were the water was still floating.
There were so many things in House's mind that he wanted to tell her but he didn't know how. He just wanted to walk towards her and pull her into an embrace, telling her what he had wanted to tell for so long, important and unimportant things, just to give her the feeling that someone cared about her, maybe lebih than he should have.
But he couldn't. He remained where he was and watched her helplessly as she wrapped her kot closer to her body. She looked at him for a last time and knew what he wanted to say...it was lebih of a certain feeling.
But Cuddy also knew that he felt the invisible dinding between them as well...something unnamed that made both of them unable to communicate with each other at the moment.
And so she looked away again, straightened herself and left the shower. House gazed after her for a short moment, limped to the pancuran, pancuran mandian and turned it off. Then he looked at the place where she had been sitting before he turned away and left too.
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Because your eyes are so sorrowful
and your forehead is so heavy with thoughts
let me comfort anda like anda sing
a child to sleep when last stars sank.
I call the sun, the ocean, the wind
to give anda their brightest sunny day.
To lay the most beautiful dream down on you.
Because your nights are so clouded.
And when your mouth starts (with) a new song
then I will thank ocean and wind and sun
because your eyes are so sorrowful
and your forehead is so heavy with thoughts.
(Mascha Kaléko
translation sejak me)
She actually had the Emo picture as part of it too.
Hope anda like it!!!!
Love can bring us together
And it can also tear us apart
To make sure that anda stay with me
I'm literally giving anda my heart.
***Comments please***
