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posted by x-menobsessed26
Application For Permission To tarikh My Daughter
Note: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied sejak a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical lapor from your physician.


Name:
tarikh of Birth:
Height:
Weight:
IQ:
GPA:
Social Security Number:
Driver's License Number:
Boy Scout Rank:
Telephone:
utama Address:
City:
State:
Zip:



Do anda have one male and one female parent? ____
If "No", explain:



Number of years your parents have been married: ____
Any brothers atau sisters? ____
Are they normal? ____


Do anda own atau have access to a van? ____
A truck with oversize tires? ____
A waterbed? ____


Do anda have an earring, nose ring, atau belly button ring? ____


Do anda have a tattoo? ____

If anda have answered YES to #3, #4 atau #5, discontinue application and leave immediately.


In fifty words atau less, what does Late mean to you?





In fifty words atau less, what does Don't touch my daughter mean to you?





In fifty words atau less, what does Abstinence mean to you?





In fifty words atau less, what does Real Pain mean to you?





Church/Temple anda attend: ____________________________

How often do anda attend: ____________________________


When would be the best time to interview your mother, father and priest/rabbi? ____________________________



Please fill in the blanks:


If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want wounded would be my ____________________________


If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken would be my ____________________________


A woman's place is in the ____________________________


The one thing I hope this application doesn't ask is ____________________________


When I meet a girl, the one thing I always notice about her first is ____________________________

Note: If answer begins with "T" atau "A", discontinue and leave premises - keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised





What do anda want to be if anda grow up?





I swear that all the above information is correct to the best of my knowledge under penalty of death, bodily harm, dismemberment, torture atau mental abuse.
Signature of applicant _________________________________

Signature of father _____________________________________

Signature of mother ____________________________________

Signature of priest/rabbi ___________________________________

Signature of State Representative _________________________



Thank anda for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow 4-6 years for processing. anda will be contacted in Penulisan if approved. If denied, please never apply again. Don't call me, I'll call you.
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posted by thatguywashot
1.Pull aside an unruly child in a preschool Sunday School class and say: "If you're bad in here, you'll go to Hell."

2.A week beforehand, find a member of ACT-UP. Tell him the scheduled sermon is entitled "Why God Sent AIDS to Punish Homosexuals".

3.Put stray Anjing in kot closets.

4.Un-tune the piano.

5.Replace the pianist's sheet Muzik with "Stairway to Heaven".

6.Going through all the hymnals, mark song 666.

7.Find an empty seat, and ask the person seterusnya to it: "Is this kerusi, tempat duduk SAVED?"

8.Toss around a giant pantai ball before service, like at Grateful Dead concerts.

9.Ten minit before it starts, find...
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