These are our rules! Please note ... these are
all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
it down. We need it up, anda need it down. anda don't hear us
complaining about anda leaving it down.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what anda want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable jawapan to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if anda want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we berkata 6 months lalu is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all komen-komen become null and void after 7 days.

1. If anda won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect
us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If anda think you're fat, anda probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we berkata can be interpreted two ways, and one of the
ways makes anda sad atau angry, we meant the other one.

1. anda can either ask us to do something atau tell us how anda want it
done. Not both. If anda already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever anda have to say
during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
for example, is a fruit, not a color. labu is also a fruit. We have
no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and anda say "nothing," we will act
like nothing's wrong. We know anda are lying, but it is just not worth
the hassle.

1. If anda ask a soalan anda don't want an answer to, expect an
answer anda don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything anda wear is fine.
Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless anda are prepared
to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, atau monster
trucks.

1. anda have enough clothes.

1. anda have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank anda for Membaca this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
sofa, kerusi panjang tonight, but did anda know men really don't mind that, it's like
camping.