This 15 tahun old girl used to maintain a common diary with her 13 tahun old best friend in which they wrote how they felt about each other and their friendship. When she discovered that her friend who had been a patient of clinical depression had tried to kill herself, she wrote this in the diary and it brought her best friend to tears...
The names have been changed as per author's request...

November 13

Dear Amira,

K so... without going on about any trivial stuff this time, anda should know that I've lebih than you'd expect to say about stuff I usually don't go on about on phone atau in person...

When I heard about your suicide attempt from Jaya and the others, it took some time (visibly an understatement) to process. To be extremely honest, I was hurt... When I finally got everything in my head, I felt extremely hurt...

anda most probably didn't tell me because anda thought I'd cry, be pissed, be worried to death, atau anda won't be able to face me anymore, but let me tell you, not telling me was only worse...

Right now, I could go on about how it must be tough on anda atau try to provide anda with solace but I want to be completely honest with you.

Talk to me when you're feeling that way dumbo!! That's exactly what I'm there for! When anda called me up and berkata that the reason anda managed to restrain yourself from such an attempt earlier was the feeling that anda won't get to talk to me if anda died, IT MADE ME HAPPY!! It made me soo happy that I could cry anda know! I COULD LITERALLY CRY!

When all this came out the way it wasn't supposed to, I wanted to just.. slap some sense into you... I wanted to slap anda soo hard! But then, I realized that the one at fault is me... I am the one who should be slapped, for lebih reasons that I'd like to count... I have failed as a best friend - completely failed... Let alone prevention, I couldn't even see through you...

Well now, for goodness' sake, don't go on blaming yourself for this way of thinking of mine! Listen to all my venting! That's the least I expect of you... Of course well, anda CAN blame yourself, if anda want me to feel worse that is.

Think about it... put yourself in my shoes... Well, ik.. easier berkata than done...i'm feeling worse than one could imagine right now..

I mean... Miss Amira Sharma! How could you!! anda stupid dumbo!! How could anda let a stupid bunch of lazy neurons take control over you!! The anda I know!!

I don't know shit about this clinical depression crap K? I'm a bloody idiotic dumbass! But seriously dude, I COULD help anda tell off those lowlife neurons that Amira Sharma isn't as weak as anda useless crappy cells think she is! only if anda want me to, that is... anda might think that you're weak... But you're not... And if anda deny, I'd totally give in to the opinion that my friendship has been useless all along...

K... anda might feel like anda should die and the world is better off without you, but for once, for goodness' sake, look around... Your mom was sitting seterusnya to anda crying when anda woke up, wasn't she?

anda have plenty of things to live for!! Want me to name 3? k!
1. Friends & Family
2. One Direction
3. Me...

Damn!I don't remember when was the last time I felt so pissed!

I don't always say it, but dude, you're a BLESSING in my life! I have no idea where I would've been without anda around! I wonder if I'd have ever come to know what friendship means if it weren't for you...

Every word I've ever written in this darned diary was straight from my heart!! I wouldn't waste my precious time I could've spent sleeping atau watching Anime in making that 'Secret Base'* for just some trivial friend...

I don't think I'd understand one BFF post on FB from the ones that we feel are relatable as of now if I hadn't met you!

Don't we always go on about how we're proud of this bond, which is totally different from those girly duos who claim to be best Friends and flaunt their pics on social sites just to end up as strangers after a few years...

Okay... I finally feel like I'll HAVE to name a few things anda can be proud of... So, here goes...
- your nature
- your face
- your figure
- your voice
- your hair
- your... wait... almost everything ever...
(complimenting anda is STILL a drag... I'm sorry XD)

Damn! okay.. After this, I wouldn't mind if anda reached the Ayush** level of conceit, I guess...

I wouldn't try to make an effort to keep under control the height of your flight either... Just start flying.

"Being down to earth is great, but being under the earth is nothing close to being good..."

I know stuff is easier berkata than done... But still, I'll help anda start moving forward, step sejak step, maybe... I'll help anda start looking up at yourself dude... You're totally lebih amazing than anda think anda are... You're worth lebih than anda think anda are... (Not every girl gets a reverse harem anda know? XD)

A lot of people Cinta anda Amira!! And I'm one of them... God doesn't send a lot of pieces like anda down here...

Just smile already!

Didn't anda say anda won't let me be sejak myself even if I wanted to? I hope anda keep your word...

If anda ever feel that way again, CALL ME! And if sejak any, i.e. 1 in a 1000 chance, I don't pick up, read this diary... atau the Secret Base! anda can even come over. atau listen to 1D... atau WATCH ANIME!!

Now I wanna sound kinda selfish here, so.. anda must know, without anda around, I'd be lebih lonely that I'd like to imagine... I don't have as many Friends as anda think I do... :P

I want to keep talking to anda about 1D and ANIME!! Forever!!

I want to see our children marrying each other!! XD

Oh come on.. You're just 13... At least consider this... It won't be fun dying off a virgin! XP At least, live a life that satisfies anda before dying Amira Sharma!!

(K.. I feel like an old sage all of a sudden...)

FOR THE SAKE OF ME AND MY FUTURE CHILDREN! DONT' DIE!!!
(I'm completely serious here...)

Cinta ya!


* Secret Base is probably a scrapbook that the penulis gave Amira as a gift.
** Ayush is someone, probably, the author's brother, who the duo has entitled as completely conceited.

That was it... Please share your thoughts in the comments...