11. Take him to Victoria's Secret with Alice.
1. Tell him Bella has decided to marry Jacob
2. Tell him anda saw Mike Newton romancing Bella on one of thse days he went *camping
3. Imagine him naked while following him around
4. Prance around the house Singing Madonna's 'Like a virgin' at the bahagian, atas of your lungs every morning, make sure Bella is around to hear
5. Running it sejak Charlie that Edward has been 'sleeping' with Bella for the past 2 years, at the wedding reception.
6. Smear your blood all over his new car freshener. Blame it on Jacob
7. tunjuk him the twilight trailer. Ask him if he's thinks that he looks like a pedophile atau if it's just you.
8. Tell him Bella wants to elope with Paul
9. For his birthday give him a $100 McDonalds gift card, and get offended when he tells anda he doesn't eat food.
10. Ask him why he likes watching Bella sleep. Call him a pervert.
11. Take him to Victoria's Secret with Alice.
12. Take him onto The Jeremy Kyle show. Make sure everyone knows he addicted to heroin.
13. Tell him anda have Bella as a witness if he denies it.
14. Picture yourself naked and covered in blood. Ask him if he wants you. Call him a liar when he says no.
15. Tell him Bella is pregnant and eloping with Mike Newton.
16. Tell him anda were kidding once he murders Mike.
17. Buy him a dog. Name it Jacob.
18. Train the dog to follow him everywhere
19. Tell him Jacob thinks he's a sex god.
20. Tell him Jane thinks he's better than a sex god.
21. Ask him if when its sunny he walks in high trafic areas just for fun.
22. Ask him how he got into bella's floor boards without leaving any evidence.
23. Sell Jacob his car for five dollars.
24. Pretend anda don't know where the car went and tunjuk him the five dollars saying it was left on his porch.
25. Ask him to dress up as Dracula and fight with Jacob in his serigala, wolf form.
26. Invite people over to his house and trash it.
27. Tell Esme and Carlisle it was Edwards idea.
28. Try to seel his katil on ebay
29. If he asks where it's gone ask him why he need a katil anyway
30. Try to sell his Cd's on ebay.
31. If he asks where they went say Jacob mencuri them.
32. Try to take his pulse and freak out when anda can't find one
33. Make a lifelike Bella dummy (with Bella audio) and throw it into a fire.
34. Volunteer him for a blood drive.
35. Give him a divorce atterny card and say, "Just in case."
36. Force him to watch the 40-Year-Old Virgin with you. Send him accusational glares at Rawak throughout the film.
37. Lock his phone after anda set Me So Horny sejak Two Live Crew as the ringtone and then call him over and over and over again in public. (for those of anda that don't know the song, there's awful loud moaning sounds while they chant me so horny over and over again.)
38.Get a shock kolar with sequins on it and have Emmett put it on Edward. Give Jacob the remote.
39. Every time he walks near anda jump in front of the nearest car and scream "Save me Edward!"
40. Challenge him to a breath holding contest and accuse him of cheating.
41. Blindfold him and take him to a tanning salon.
42. Jump out of corners and proceed to beating him with large planks of wood every ten minutes
43. Sit in his room and stare at him for hours.
44. When he demands why you're staring at him tell him that you're not leaving until he falls asleep.
45. When he tells anda he can't sleep, threaten that Santa won't come if he stays awake.
46. Paint his Volvo merah jambu and write “I Cinta Jacob” all over it
47. Sing "It’s a Small World" over and over in your head and follow him around
48. Give his number to Jessica and tell her, he’s interested
49.Ask him about Bella’s eighteenth birthday party
50. Just think of the color black when he's around so he thinks he can't read your mind either.
51. Refer to him as "Eddie".
52. Prank call him saying anda have kidnapped Bella and will only accept his volvo as ransom.
53. Sing 'I know a song that'll get on your nerves' in your head continually, over and over again, he'll go insane in less then three hours guarenteed
54. Come to school wearing dark robes, red/black contacts, and white makeup. Go up to Edward. Claim to be from the Volturi, and ask him where Bella is.
55. Get Carlisle to have "The Talk" with him.
56. Torch his meadow.
57. Run around the school with flyers that say "Save the Mountain Lion!"
58. Set the banner on Bella's cellphone to I Cinta Jacob.
59. Do the same thing to his.
60. Say, "Oh anda and Bella looked so cute at the Filem yesterday" and when he says that they never went to the Filem say, "Oh, but I'm sure it was Bella, and she was all over that other guy."
61. Tell him Darth Vader is his father
62. Run around the school shouting, 'EDWARD CULLEN IS A VIRGIN'
63. Make Bella president of the La Push Cliff Diving Society
64. Randomly run up with a stake yelling "Die, fiend!"
65. Superglue Bella's window shut.
66. In front of Nessie, say aren't anda glad anda didn't kill the little brat.
67. Remind him that Jacob and Nessie are eventually going to...well anda know.
68. Say, "wow, anda Lost your virginity at 107 and your daughter is going to lose hers at 7...to the guy who was in Cinta with your wife
69. Every time anda take a picture of him, ask him if he'll tunjuk up when anda print it out.
70. Before anda print it out, photoshop it so he doesn't tunjuk up in it.Print it out and tunjuk it to him.
71. Continually poke him with a pencil muttering quietly about how it's the closest thing to a wooden stake anda can get.
72. For his birthday, buy him spray-on tan.
73. Tell him anda think it's great that he gave Bella up to Jake. When he asks anda what you're talking about, say "uh...I've already berkata too much." and run away.
74. After Bella dumps him for killing Jacob, tell him it was a misunderstanding, and that Bella and Jacob were never together.
75. Cover his yard with "Beware of Vampire" signs.
76. Make an "I Cinta Jacob" website and say Bella made it.
77. Tell him he didn't steal Bella's virginity, Jacob did.
78. Tell him that Nessie is Jaspers daughter.
79. When anda 'discover' he's a vampire, throw holy water on him and shout,"The power of Christ compels you!"
80. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.
81. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.
82. Tell Tanya Edward has decided to take her back
83. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”
84. Whenever he complains atau argues, reply with “What are anda gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”
85. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” sejak Madonna.
86. Run around with a lighter threatenign to set him on api, kebakaran if he comes any closer.
87. Ask him to turn anda into a vampire, beg and plead when he says no... then threaten Bella's life. When he agrees say I can't wait till Bella hears about this. Once he has bitten anda scream in agony and cry asking him how he could do this to a perfect little girl like me?
88. Once anda change into a vampire, tell Edwrd anda bit Bella, saying he was right and Bella' blood does smell amazing and anda couldn't resist, sorry.
89. Push him into the sun and start o sing Diamonds are a girl's best friend
90. Throw garlic at him while screaming die die die
91. Shove him over the boundary line
92. Stab him with a pencil
93. Stare at him for ages. When he asks what tour doing ask him if he's that guy from Harry Potter
94. Drive slow
95. When he tells anda him and Bella are gettng married get up and go OMG Bella are anda pregnant
96. Buy him and Bella matching Team Jacob t-shirts
97. Put Cinta notes into his locker and sign them Jacob Black
98. Sing at the bahagian, atas of your voice.... Bella and Edward sitting in a tree. H-U-N-T-I-N-G!
99. Invite the whole La Push pack to his wedding. When he gets upset cry and say anda were only trying to help
100. Read New Moon and talk about it whenever he is around
