I got this off an e-mail from a friend, so this is not mine and I take no claim in it. Please don't do these things in real life, it's just for fun and a good laugh. And if anda do do these things (number 4 fo example), than I'm sorry but you're really dumb.
Enjoy!
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6 Ways On How To Deal With yu, ikan jerung Attacks:
1) DON'T SWIM IN THE SEA
lebih than 99% of yu, ikan jerung attacks happen in large watermasses- also know as oceans. An easy way to tell if anda are in an ocean is to taste the water- it will taste like salt.
2) SWIM ALONGSIDE FAT PEOPLE
Make sure that there are always fat people in the water with you. Odds are that anda can swim faster than them- increasing your chances of escape.
3) SUNBLOCK
Replace the sunblock of the person seterusnya to anda with BBQ rib sauce.
4) DON'T GO INTO THE WATER WITHOUT A KNIFE
As soon as anda spot a shark- furiously stab the person seterusnya to you. As soon as he is bleeding proufusely- swim away as fast as anda can.
5) LISTEN CAREFULLY
Every yu, ikan jerung has a theme song. If anda here the following- swim for your life: da-dam. da-dam. da-dam if it's fast like this: dadam, dadam, dadam- give up -you are already screwed.
6) DON'T PANIC
Stay calm if a yu, ikan jerung has got you. At this late stage anda are screwed in any case- survival is not an option... The people on the pantai do not appreciate someone screaming & shouting like a lunatic- it just isn't pleasant -think of the children damnit!
Happy swimming! :D
Enjoy!
__________________________________________________
6 Ways On How To Deal With yu, ikan jerung Attacks:
1) DON'T SWIM IN THE SEA
lebih than 99% of yu, ikan jerung attacks happen in large watermasses- also know as oceans. An easy way to tell if anda are in an ocean is to taste the water- it will taste like salt.
2) SWIM ALONGSIDE FAT PEOPLE
Make sure that there are always fat people in the water with you. Odds are that anda can swim faster than them- increasing your chances of escape.
3) SUNBLOCK
Replace the sunblock of the person seterusnya to anda with BBQ rib sauce.
4) DON'T GO INTO THE WATER WITHOUT A KNIFE
As soon as anda spot a shark- furiously stab the person seterusnya to you. As soon as he is bleeding proufusely- swim away as fast as anda can.
5) LISTEN CAREFULLY
Every yu, ikan jerung has a theme song. If anda here the following- swim for your life: da-dam. da-dam. da-dam if it's fast like this: dadam, dadam, dadam- give up -you are already screwed.
6) DON'T PANIC
Stay calm if a yu, ikan jerung has got you. At this late stage anda are screwed in any case- survival is not an option... The people on the pantai do not appreciate someone screaming & shouting like a lunatic- it just isn't pleasant -think of the children damnit!
Happy swimming! :D
from the internet :)
(1) Tell him that he looked better bald.
(2) Put purple dye in his shampoo.
(3) When he goes to get his hair trimed, tell the barber that he would get 100 dollars to cut all his hair off.
(4) Ask what it was like to have Ke$sha babysit him.
(5) Tell him he reminds anda of the Ken doll.
(6) Ask if Selena is his Barbie girl.
(7) Change his ringtone to 'Whip my Hair'.
(8) Call him while he's doing a talk show.
(9) Ask why he keeps making songs about relationships.
(10) Ask if he wants to dump Selena because he keeps making those songs.
(11) Give his fangirls his utama adress
(12) Finally, ask why he goes for older women instead of 16-year olds. When he jawapan he thinks they're cute tell him that your telling Selena that she's too young for him
(1) Tell him that he looked better bald.
(2) Put purple dye in his shampoo.
(3) When he goes to get his hair trimed, tell the barber that he would get 100 dollars to cut all his hair off.
(4) Ask what it was like to have Ke$sha babysit him.
(5) Tell him he reminds anda of the Ken doll.
(6) Ask if Selena is his Barbie girl.
(7) Change his ringtone to 'Whip my Hair'.
(8) Call him while he's doing a talk show.
(9) Ask why he keeps making songs about relationships.
(10) Ask if he wants to dump Selena because he keeps making those songs.
(11) Give his fangirls his utama adress
(12) Finally, ask why he goes for older women instead of 16-year olds. When he jawapan he thinks they're cute tell him that your telling Selena that she's too young for him
1. read
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying Rawak things until u cry laughing
5. continue Membaca this
6. Walk up to siblings and say Rawak things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on Facebook and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on Google look up jay leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add Rawak people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying Rawak things until u cry laughing
5. continue Membaca this
6. Walk up to siblings and say Rawak things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on Facebook and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on Google look up jay leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add Rawak people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
okay, on my 5 completely Rawak things to do...
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as anda can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as anda can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend anda try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as anda can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as anda can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend anda try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
The bahagian, atas six reasons computers must be female:
6. As soon as anda have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command atau File Name" is about as informative as
"If anda don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as anda make a commitment to one, anda find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
6. As soon as anda have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command atau File Name" is about as informative as
"If anda don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as anda make a commitment to one, anda find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
1.everyone around anda has an attitude problem
2.your adding Chocolate chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything anda say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive anda crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and anda just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to punch someone without a reason
12.if anda start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if anda were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give anda 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so anda know*
2.your adding Chocolate chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything anda say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive anda crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and anda just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to punch someone without a reason
12.if anda start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if anda were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give anda 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so anda know*
If you’re an animal lover, like me, this story might be to much to take. But I can’t believe people can be so cruel. But I believe that when someone abuses a poor defenseless animal, that someone should be telah diberi LIFE in prison without the possibility atau parole.
A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet ular sawa, python refused to eat it was telah diberi three years of supervised probation on Friday.
Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.
The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD menunjukkan Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the ular sawa, python in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.
When the ular sawa, python failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.
A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet ular sawa, python refused to eat it was telah diberi three years of supervised probation on Friday.
Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.
The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD menunjukkan Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the ular sawa, python in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.
When the ular sawa, python failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.