Siri-siri Twilight Club
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Okay so my brother and I were swimming in our pool and suddenly we start talking Twilight.Well, if anda know us then anda know that we stared role playing.Mason REALLY wanted to be Edward so I let him.And I was Emmett. And so I started thinking of a joke paragraph.I REALLY hope anda guys like it.

Emmett's pov.

"Where is Edward?!?", I thought to myself. I had been searching our property for well around 5 minit and I knew he could hear my thoughts.
" Up here Em.", he berkata chuckling from his room all the way upstairs. He knew I would hear.I was still in the forest.I was up and in his room in a record 4 seconds. atau at least record for a human. "jeese Edward!Couldn't have let that go on longer?",I berkata a bit sharply.

"No.I was getting bored.", he said.

"Okay well, let's get down to bussiness shall we? I thought up another way to annoy Alice.", I said.
" I'm all ears."
" Well, I figured out a way to fart!!!How totally awesome is THAT?", I berkata in a rush.
"Very awesome."
Man. Why was he keeping his anserws so short? " So you'll hurry up and tell me how to fart.", he berkata a little impatient. " Jeese.", I berkata again. He sighed. "Alright. So if anda can gulp down enough air and concentrate really hard anda can fart.", I berkata triumphently. "And how did anda come across this?", he berkata chuckling, for he already knew the anserw. "Never mind that", I snapped. Was he doiing his best to irritate me in my moment of glory? " Yes.", he berkata fighting a smile. " Stop that!", I berkata sharply. "See watch.I'll demonstrate.", I said. I took a deep breath that no human could take and took two lebih just to be on the selamat, peti deposit keselamatan side. Now for the embarrassung part. The concentrating. I balled my hands in fists nd benter. I must have looked like a conctapated kid, because he was on the ground holding his sides and booming with laughter in half a second. "Hey cut it out atau anda won't hear it ", I said. " Oh.I WON'T?", he retorted clearly enjoying himself. But at least he cut it out.Then finally brpf( Rawak letters =fart sounds, the lebih letters the longer the fart)."Of course I'll have to work on it, but...", I berkata clearly proud. "Oh that's for SURE!!", he berkata laughing again."Let's go practice.", he berkata eager to learn.


*********



"Oh Alice...", we chimed.
"What is it?", she stated obviously annoyed.
"We just wanted to tunjuk anda something.", we berkata in unison once more. "Oh this aught to be good.", berkata rosalie ,nudging Jasper.We each sucked in a REEEEEEEEALY deep breath. For Alice, Jacob, Carlisle,Esme, Rosalie, and Jasper were there.(Bella and Renesmee were visiting Charlie and amazingly Jacob was visiting me.Or at least staying for the game. Flat screen anda know.)We balled our fists knelt down and...........bfr dfr.And then a thunder storm broke out.Everyone was on the ground rolling, holding their sides and BOOMING with laughter. While we stood there gawking at them. It had taken weeks of hard core practice to get that far, and last time it lasted 20 seconds!!! Even Alice was laughing. "aren't anda the least bit disgusted?!?", I asked. "That.. was... just.. too... funny.", she gasped."Nice one guys!!", joked Jacob. "Man it took 6 weeks to get that far!", I berkata irritatedly. HDSHGHEHRHGHRTGJHDFJGLDFHHTIHRIYTHDSFGHUER!!!!! "And that took about 2 seconds!", smiled Jacob."Well it's harder for Vampires to fart okay Mr. Showoff!", I said."OH MY GOD! JACOB! WHAT DID anda EAT?!?!?!?!", laughed Carlisle. sejak now everyone was outside at least 1 mile away from the house.
"Well, Jake. At least anda can annoy Alice.", i laughed as we sprinted from the contaminated house.(Both holding our noses I might add) Just then Alice charges at us staring daggers at Jacob. "You, mutt. come here.", berkata Alice. "No way! I may be half dog but even I'm not that stupid.", berkata Jacob cautiously. "No come on. I'm not going to hurt you.", berkata Alice lebih alluringly now as she flashed one of her smiles that would make any man come to her." That doesn't work on me.", berkata Jake. "Then why are anda coming closer?", berkata Alice still trying to lure him in. "Don't do it jake", I whispered. Jake was still walking closer.... And then he was right in front of Alice. "Oh no, I can't watch", I berkata still watching." anda can't but I can.", berkata Edward chuckling. sejak now everyone was watching.(Even Bella and Nessie, they got back early)Then suddenly, WHACK!!!!! Alice got Jake right on the nose. He jumped and ran for his life. Alice right behind him screaming things like," I JUST WENT SHOPPING THOSE ARE BRAND NEW chanel dresses! NOT TO MENTION ALL OF THE LOUIS VUITTON PURSESAND DOLCE AND GABBANNA DRESSES!!!!!!! AND NOW THEY ARE ALL RUINED!!!!!"she screamed." How much are anda willing to bet he is going to get his sorry keldai knocked around?", berkata Edward. "50 bucks says Alice will beat him again in the seterusnya minute?", I said. "Your on.", berkata Edward."Edward aren't anda going to go help him?", Bella berkata worriedly. "Emmett's tougher that I am he can take Alice when she's this mad I can't.", berkata Edward getting a bit worried himself."Ahh. But anda Eddie boy are much faster than I.", I berkata knowing I won. "Edward . Please for me I don't want him to get hurt and you're faster than Alice anyway.", begged Bella." Man how cruel is that making your wife beg. Pathetic.", I taunted."Shut. Up. Emmett.", he growled. and then he left to go rescue Jacob from Alice's wrath." anda know he won't survive right?", I asked. "I kinda figured.", berkata Bella. "hey Bella can anda go make some popcorn this is going to be good." " But we don't eat popcorn." "Get it anyway." I berkata and sat down to enjoy the tunjuk just as Edward got socked in the head."Luxury."
posted by BuffyFaithFan1
Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume One
BuffyFaithfan1
_________________________
[INTRO]
So, if anda forgot the last three things that have happened, here is exactly what did happen:
1.) A pisau was thrown at my head.
2.) I almost consumed a poisonous chicken
and 3.) The Death Clan of the Fallen are after me.
Pretty scary right? If anda think it isn't, well then leave right now, because it is. Not only do they know where I live, but they probably have been watching me for a while. Hopefully Tabra and I can get through this. We have to, right? Hero triumphs over the Villain!?
I sure hope so...
___________________________...
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posted by a-jforever
Heres part three.....I think. Enjoy.XXXX

What do anda want of me?” I asked straightening up to try being civil.

“Ok you’re going to think me a complete freak when I tell anda so come inside and sit down.”

“NOT INSIDE.” The bronze haired one protested.
Alice closed her eyes growing very still and then opening them.

“See Edward she won’t hurt Renesmee.” Edward nodded stepping out the way of the door. But whatever Alice had done hadn’t convinced him enough as he hurried in before us.

“Are anda Phoebe?” A little girl with Bronze curly hair came round the corner smiling at me her...
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posted by Cullens4eva
I Cinta MY SISTER SOOOOOOO MUCH! We all screamed till our throats hurt, this is just amazing. As we stopped mom walked in and started to tidy up the lounge. To be honest I'd forgotten she was actually here.

"Girls that's enough. Now what's all this screaming about hey? There's no need for it." She finished doing some light dusting and sat down with a book. Probably some romance knowing mom, she was so predictable. Her life is a romance novel, her meeting my dad after nearly jumping off a cliff, falling helplessly in love, having 3 beautiful girls, living in a house to die for...

We all sat down...
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posted by BuffyFaithFan1
Hello, My Name Is: Death
Volume One
BuffyFaithfan1
_________________________________________
[ONE]
This was like no other Monday. Why anda ask? Well, maybe if a pisau flew at your head, anda would agree with me. And it wasn't like magic flying, it was like an assassain threw a pisau at my head and tried to kill me! At first, all I could think of was RUN, but later on I knew why he was after me. Here is exactly what happened...
I was driving to the store, and I got out of my car and went inside. I was almost done, I just needed susu and cookie dough, and they were in the same isle, so I picked up...
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"wait stop" i pleaded
i felt the air shake as if something starang and out of the ordanary was happerning
"who are you? turn slowly we need to see something" this dark but some how fimiliar voice oreded so i did i turned very slowly not giving them reason to kill me.

there he was. paul.
"omg! paul! its been ages" i started to alih toward him but he stepped back and did what jake onse did. he shook.
"hey calm down paul geez if jake was here he would be laughing" i sighed as he tensed at the sound of his best Friends name.
"how do anda know jake?" he asked he wasnt so violent anymore so that must...
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posted by smileyfaceddude
I sighed with relief as the phone conversation was over and snapped it shut. God! Edward, is way too curious, and pushy, he asks too many questions, as if he was interrogating me; which he kind of was. I thought over tonight, and Renesmee's little adventure. I had to get rid of those bottles, so that would NEVER happen again, (and my new shoes, which i had just started to like). I'm not sure what would best for us right now, and Edward was asking what’s going on, and where precisely Renesmee was, I was glad he couldn’t read my mind from the phone.

Renesmee

Oh.
What a throbbing headache!...
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posted by amy_r_cullen
Edward's pov

"Daddy say somthing, anda haven't berkata anything for about ten miniits i'll read you're mind if anda don't tell me". Renesmee pushed.


"Sorry Renesmee i was just thinking can anda read you're mothers mind". I questioned.

"Errr I think so why, do anda wan't me to". Renesmee replied.

"well yes please, it's just you'r mother only lets me in her head when she wants me there, and the rest of the time I have to guess". I was trying to persuade Renesmee to help me.

"Why do anda want to know what goes on in momma's head". Renesmee pushed.

"I just want to know if she is happy atau not atau if she worries...
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posted by CarlislesLover
Sorry I haven't telah diposkan this in ages.
XXXX



6 Years later.
I’m now twenty-four years old. I’m married to Edward and we live in Canada together. I still have my job as a fashion designer and I do model. But lately I’ve been asked to do other things. I got a letter through the post a few days lalu about being in a film. I didn’t tunjuk Edward because I knew he would say no, so I kept it to myself. I really would like to be in the film, but it would mean I would be away from Edward for ages. I was already spending a lot of time away from Edward. He’s at utama right now whilst I’m in New Zealand....
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posted by alicecullenrox1
Chapter 1- The Unimaginable

Kate's POV

New York. When anda go, anda imagine a nice vacation, maybe a business meeting. anda wouldn't dream of having your entire world crash around anda as the past, becomes part of the present.

I was leaving the shopping center when I noticed something peculiar going on in the city. I imediately dialed Alice's number. Hearing the ringing echoing in my ear was like torture.

“Hello?” I heard Alice ask, she sounded afraid. Something was up....

"Alice! Something's wrong! People in the city are Berlakon strange! I was waiting for anda guys at the shopping center and everyone...
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posted by twilight-7
Kayla’s POV


“Cheat!” Emmett shouted, throwing the controller down. He was careful not to throw it so hard that it might break.
“No I didn’t!” I shouted back. “You’re a sore loser!”
He stood up and I stood up. We narrowed our eyes.
“Let’s settle this,” he said. “One on one. Outside.”
“You’re on.”
“I don’t think so,” Rosalie, who had been watching us play the game, stood up and squeezed herself between us.
“Rose, don’t get involved,” Emmett said, trying to push her away.
“She’s pregnant, anda idiot,” she smacked him across the head. “Sit down.”...
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posted by CarlislesLover
We finished shopping finally. “I’m sorry I have to go now”

“Ok, I’ll see anda whenever I seterusnya wake you”

“Ok bye”

“Bye”

She left me going back to her grave. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t go back and see the faces of my family. Jasper was likely to kill me if I went back. Edward would be like oh Bella I Cinta anda so much none of this is your fault and Jasper would be like she knocked my wife unconscious I hate anda and I’d be sat there like whatever guys leave me alone. So I decided to go back. I walked in and they were all sat in the living room on the sofa. “I’m...
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posted by Tatti
"Hey, I berkata tunjuk your hands!" I screamed but apparently my voice and gun didn't left them any impression - they didn't moved, they even didn't look scared. What if my gun is useless against them? "I berkata HANDS! Don't make me shoot you" - again with no effect. Suddenly blond started moving towards so quickly that I hardly could see him. I had time only to make one step back before he appeared in front of me. For a saat I was praying cause I was sure I will die but while I was looking at him Edward and Bella also moved and they were standing sejak me either.
"Jasper, calm down. We are not killers"...
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posted by CarlislesLover
This may sound like the end but it isn't.
XXXX




I did what I did with every other country. I saw the Cullen’s in the audience along with Charlie, Jacob and Billy. Jessica, mike, Angela and Eric were all there too. I knew so many people in the audience, but I had to ignore them and carry on. I finished at last and went back stage. My boss was going back early and berkata I could stay here for as long as I wanted. I got changed in to something else. Then Charlie walked in. He drove me home, the Cullen’s following behind. We all entered the house and sat down on the sofa. “What happened to you?”...
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posted by smileyfaceddude
I made out a black figure, and a jubah, berjubah draped on his shoulders.
“CYNNDDYLAN!” I roared furiously, he approached us, and then threw his jubah, berjubah off onto the ground.
“You called…?” he asked quietly, his eyes amused and challenging.
“Where is my daughter?” I demanded.
“How should I know? Well, it’s not MY fault anda cant look after her properly.” He berkata smugly “But… I DO know WHERE she is… for a price!” he added, my eyes widened with anger and disgust.
“I don’t want to play your stupid games!” I shouted angrily, he rose an eyebrow and smiled, but it was a cold,...
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posted by CarlislesLover
Sorry for the delay.
XXXX




We got back to my apartment and I got changed back into the clothes I was wearing before I had the piercing. “Now anda need to go back to work to see if they have your dress for you”

“Ok” We drove back to where my dress was being made. “Aren’t anda coming in Lucy?

“No sorry I have to go”

“Oh ok” I walked in to the large building and back into the lift up to the floor my dress was being made on. “We have finished” The man berkata happily as I walked in. “Go try it on for me” I went and tried it on. I looked in the mirror it was amazing. “Wow...
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posted by CarlislesLover
Part 11 finaly !!!!
xxxx


I was then blind folded and knocked out. I woke up in a huge white room. “This is where we’re going to train anda to fight. Our way” Edward hadn’t even taught me how to fight yet but when the man berkata ‘our way’ it was obviously going to be a different way to how my family fight. Vampires started to enter the room. “Now watch us” A woman told me “And if anda don’t you’ll be in trouble” She took a man and they started menunjukkan me a fight. It looked complicated as each one of them took it in turn fighting each other it looked so hard. “I can’t do...
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*by Stephenie Meyer*



NEW MOON - chapter 1 - PARTY


Edward drive north through Forks, visibly chafing at the speed enforced sejak my prehistoric Chevy. The engine groaned even louder than usual as he pushed it over fifty.
"Take it easy," I warned him.
"You know what anda would love? A nice little Audi coupe. Very quiet, lots of power..."
"There's nothing wrong with my truck. And speaking of expensive nonessentials, if anda know what's good for you, anda didn't spend any money on birthday presents."
"Not a dime," he berkata virtuously.
"Good."
"Can anda do me a favor?"
"That depends on what it is."...
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posted by WritenOnTheSand
 Nessie Black
Nessie Black
Jake and I haven't been really speaking today. He thinks I messed up big time yesterday sejak telling the truth. I think he messed up big time sejak being rude. Sometimes girls just get moody, and he should know that sejak now.

The problem with being upset is that it brings all the negative things in your life to attention. Jake and I are not doing so well money wise. His repair kedai is okay but not making enough money to support us. I haven't been to work since the wedding. I thought that once I was married, I wouldn't have to worry about working. Wrong idea.

I kinda feel like I am just useless, and...
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Chapter One: All the way from Tennessee
Rosalie POV
    
    Two short years lalu I was turned into a monster. I'm beautiful, yet still a monster. Being a vampire wasn't fun at all. I personally don't like eating animals. Well, their blood that is. But, rather a deer than a human I guess.
    I was hunting in the deep woods of Tennessee. It was far from where we were staying in the Appalachian Mountains, but, once again, Edward had gotten on my last nerve. Sometimes, no most of the time, I just want to rip Edward apart limb from limb....
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posted by a-jforever
No...No he has to be joking right.
“Victoria got away?” I whimpered. She would be back for me and there would be no delay on killing me this time. It would be so quick that Alice and Jacob wouldn’t be able to save me.

“Bella, are anda ok?” Alice asked entering the kitchen.

Jacob stiffened. And Alice scrunched up her nose.

“WHAT IS THAT AWFUL SMELL?” she complained.

“It’s me, Leech. And I have to say, anda don’t smell that good either.”

“Guys please.” I begged. I couldn’t be dealing with this right now.

“I guess we don’t smell that appealing to each other then.” Alice...
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