Harry Potter vs. Twilight Club
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posted by HaleyDewit
1.A lot of trees have been sacrificed for Twishit
2.It's deathly boring
3.Sparkling vampires?Really?
4.Edward is a pedophile and a stalker.To every girl who thinks Edward's the perfect boyfriend: a guy who watches anda when anda sleep,is not romantic,but creepy.
5.There are a lot of plotholes
6.Bella has as much personality as the spoon I'm looking at right now.
7.Quotations like 'liquid topaz eyes' (since when are eyes liquid???)and 'it's an optional choice'(Where does Smeyer live,because it's obvious they don't have a dictionary there)
8.Bella is the stereotype of the woman before feminism.She's completely dependent of her stalker boyfriend and is totally helpless without him.
9.Bella despised and abuses her friends.
10.Bella finds the external lebih important that the inner.Otherwise she would've treated Mike with a little lebih respect.
11.There's no Cinta in Twilight.The only reasons we know why they're so attracted to each other are Bella's smell and Edward's perfect external facets.Considering neither of them has a personality they can't learn to know each other better and therefore their relationship is based on these external facets.This is not love,but lust.If Edward hadn't been so perfectly good-looking Bella wouldn't have adjudged him a saat glance.And if Bella's mind wasn't closed,Edward wouldn't have any interests in her.
12.Bella is a stupid whining cry baby.She gives a clearly depressed impression and in the Filem her facial expression rarely changes.So she's depressed.Why?There's no cat who knows.
13.Smeyer keeps saying the same thing.We know Bella can't make a alih without menunjukkan her clumsy nature.We know Edward is perfect.We know it rains a lot in Forks.
14.Bella's considered the new role model to many girls.Bella also gets pregnant in Eclipse.Forgive me if I do not see the connection between 'role model' and 'getting pregnant as a teenager'
15.Bella imprints?? her baby to Jacob as a consolation prize because she thinks Edward's hotter.
16.Bella uses Jacob.She knew he had feelings for her and she exploited that.For example: she made him fix a motorcycle for her so she could catch a glimp of her precious Edward and the moment Edward was back she ran back into his arms and left Jacob like his feelings didn't matter.
17.'Bella Swan' means 'Beautiful Swan' I think she's still in the ugly itik phase.I'm just saying it's a stupid name?
18.Smeyer claims she's as good as J.K.Rowling.Every Harry Potter peminat who has read Twilight will pasti that this is bullshit and wishful thinking.Smeyer doesn't even reach Jo's ankles.She's a horrible writer.
19.Edward can't read Bella's mind.Reason: Bella doesn't have a mind.
20.The whole Twilight mess is based on a wet dream.
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(NOTE TO READERS: I'LL BE CRITICISING SEVRUS SNAPE IN THIS ARTICLE. BUT THIS IS A ONCE OFF. OTHERWISE I AM TEAM SNAPE 4EVA =])


We all know Bella over-reacted in New Moon. That's a common aregument. But now some Twilight peminat-peminat say Lily over-reacted when Sevrus called her mud-blood compared to how Hermione took it from Draco. But personally I think Lily didn't over-react.

Sevrus and Lily's friendship was rocky for a while. She despised his Friends and his ideas for the future. He despised the fact James fancied Lily. They had areguments (Lily says "I've made excuses for anda long enough" in Deathly...
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Dulce et Decorum Est (1917)
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Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had Lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod.Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had Lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod.
Gas! GAS! Quick, boys! — An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just...
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These are a bunch of funny alternate endings to Harry Potter I found. I did NOT write them.

Scooby Doo ending: Voldemort is captured, and is revealed to be Filch wearing a mask. As he is hauled away, he shouts, “And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for anda meddling kids!”

South Park ending: After defeating Voldemort, Harry and Ron address the audience, saying, “You know, I’ve learned something today.” Suddenly, Ginny is run over sejak the Knight Bus, prompting Ron to shout, “They killed Ginny!” Harry responds, “You bastards!” Neville laughs and says it’s...
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posted by Ravenclaw2001
Let's just get this straight before anda go harping on my artikel because I'm a Twitard. Because I'm not. I'm just getting a little sick of Bella angsa, swan being called "too perfect". She's perfect about to the extent that I am a Twilight fan. Which is to say, not at all.


OK, Let me tell anda a story about a REAL Mary-Sue.

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Anastasia B. Ana was in 6th grade, she was tiny for the age of ten (she skipped kindergarten), she was absolutely adorable, and she was in Gifted and 7th grade math. Boys all loved her, and she could crochet, knit, and she had perfect handwriting....
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