Some great ways to annoy, harass, confuse, atau generally scare Lord Voldemort.
Sure-fire ways to get yourself killed, atau at least Crucio'd round the block and back again.
Make sure to read the whole thing, it's worth it!
1. Ask him why he doesn't have such a cool scar.
2. Call him The-Guy-Who-Let-The-Boy-Live.
3. Smile during Death Eater meetings and say anda taught him everything he knows.
4. Remind him that he isn't even really alive.
5. Ask him when he last took a bath.
6. Pat him on the head and give him Bunga when his plans are foiled yet again
7. Play "knock and run" at his bedchamber door late at night.
8. Ask him why the Dark Mark couldn't look like something lebih "sociably acceptable".
9. If anda ever need to say "Like taking Kandi from a baby", be sure to add: '"Of course, SOME of us might find that harder than others." Stare pointedly at him.
10. When he tries to impress anda with his immense powers, say "Awwwww, lookit, Voldie's got a twiggle!"
11. Roll your eyes during plotting sessions and say things under your breath like "You're the boss, boss" atau "It's your funeral."
12. Buy him eye drops for "that dreadful redness".
13. Greet him in the mornings with a sarcastic "My sir, anda look particularly menacing today."
14. Taunt him about his middle name. "Marvolo? What's that, a washing detergent?"
15. Keep a "good-behavior chart". Award points and give out emas stars.
16. Magic-marker Potter-style glasses on him while he sleeps.
17. Apparate into and out of his room rapidly. Do this non-stop for an hour. *poof* there *poof* gone *poof* there...
18. Tell people "he's really just a big softie".
19. Follow a few paces behind him, spraying everything he touches with a can of disinfectant.
20. Anytime he enters any room, insist on entering first and announcing him grandly.
21. In these announcements, fake a trumpet noise and give him an equally fake drumroll.
22. Get a pair of finger puppets closely resembling himself and Harry Potter. Re-enact all of Harry's victories over him in a spectacularly childish way. Be sure to give them both squeaky voices.
23. "Did anda ever even HAVE a girlfriend? Like, ever?"
24. Encourage him to "think happy thoughts"!
25. Ask him to give anda written summaries of his sinister plots for revenge and war. Correct his spelling.
26. Sign him up for yoga class. Insist it is to "cleanse his soul".
27. Buy him a stress ball.
28. Hide his wand. Make him play the "hot and cold" game in order to get it back.
29. Quote Argus Filch. Insist HE will one hari rule the wizarding world.
30. Call him "Tommy-boy".
31. If you're feeling gutsy, call him "Voldie-poo".
32. Be generally in awe of him and never look away.
33. Whack him in the arm and say "mosquito" - every few minutes.
34. If he asks anda about his choice of robes, say he looked better under the turban.
35. Begin any soalan anda ask him with "Riddle me this!" Emphasize on Riddle.
36. Imperio his Death Eaters into a rousing chorus of "All Things Bright And Beautiful".
37. Paint all the Death Eater masks with bright Warna and glitter.
38. Throw him a Carebears-themed birthday party. Bake him a scar-shaped cake.
39. Tell him what Snape's really up to.
40. Politely exclaim now and again that anda don't know how he can be so afraid of dear old Dumbles.
41. Tell him his plastic surgeon did a terrible job with the "red-eyed snake look," and that he should've had the self confidence to age gracefully.
42. Tell him anda know this great therapist in London....
43. Ask him if he's sure the whole evil-maniac-out-for-power-and-revenge thing isn't getting a bit old?
44. Tell him Lucius did it.
45. Write him a theme song. Start Singing it whenever he is about to do atau say something particularly clever and nasty.
46. When he's done something particularly nasty - menyeberang, cross your arms, waggle a finger and say "Now now, do anda really think Salazar would have approved of that?"
47. Make vague allusions to Harry Potter being his son.
48. Ask him how he can possibly wish to harm a single hair on the head of "that sweet, innocent, cute little boy".
49. Ask him why he's afraid of an old man who looks like Santa Claus and why he can't fight babies.
50. Sign him up for Little League.
51. Cuddle him at Rawak moments.
52. Tell him that noses are back in style.
53. Be Harry Potter. Be Alive.
54. Call him "Champ" atau "Tiger", refer to yourself as "Coach".
55. Ask him where he gets his garlic scented soap.
56. Ask him to dye Easter eggs with you
57. ...at Christmas.
58. "Accidentally" schedule him a haircut
59. ...even though he's bald.
60. When he gives anda an order, stare blankly at him and drool.
61. On the seterusnya Valentine's Day, decorate his lair
62. ...make sure the decorations are merah jambu and frilly.
63. Be offended sejak everthing he says.
64. Trade in his black robes for bunny feet pajamas.
65. Three words: Potter Puppet Pals.
P.S. Make sure to print this senarai on Harry Potter Stationary, get it laminated, and give it to him.
Sure-fire ways to get yourself killed, atau at least Crucio'd round the block and back again.
Make sure to read the whole thing, it's worth it!
1. Ask him why he doesn't have such a cool scar.
2. Call him The-Guy-Who-Let-The-Boy-Live.
3. Smile during Death Eater meetings and say anda taught him everything he knows.
4. Remind him that he isn't even really alive.
5. Ask him when he last took a bath.
6. Pat him on the head and give him Bunga when his plans are foiled yet again
7. Play "knock and run" at his bedchamber door late at night.
8. Ask him why the Dark Mark couldn't look like something lebih "sociably acceptable".
9. If anda ever need to say "Like taking Kandi from a baby", be sure to add: '"Of course, SOME of us might find that harder than others." Stare pointedly at him.
10. When he tries to impress anda with his immense powers, say "Awwwww, lookit, Voldie's got a twiggle!"
11. Roll your eyes during plotting sessions and say things under your breath like "You're the boss, boss" atau "It's your funeral."
12. Buy him eye drops for "that dreadful redness".
13. Greet him in the mornings with a sarcastic "My sir, anda look particularly menacing today."
14. Taunt him about his middle name. "Marvolo? What's that, a washing detergent?"
15. Keep a "good-behavior chart". Award points and give out emas stars.
16. Magic-marker Potter-style glasses on him while he sleeps.
17. Apparate into and out of his room rapidly. Do this non-stop for an hour. *poof* there *poof* gone *poof* there...
18. Tell people "he's really just a big softie".
19. Follow a few paces behind him, spraying everything he touches with a can of disinfectant.
20. Anytime he enters any room, insist on entering first and announcing him grandly.
21. In these announcements, fake a trumpet noise and give him an equally fake drumroll.
22. Get a pair of finger puppets closely resembling himself and Harry Potter. Re-enact all of Harry's victories over him in a spectacularly childish way. Be sure to give them both squeaky voices.
23. "Did anda ever even HAVE a girlfriend? Like, ever?"
24. Encourage him to "think happy thoughts"!
25. Ask him to give anda written summaries of his sinister plots for revenge and war. Correct his spelling.
26. Sign him up for yoga class. Insist it is to "cleanse his soul".
27. Buy him a stress ball.
28. Hide his wand. Make him play the "hot and cold" game in order to get it back.
29. Quote Argus Filch. Insist HE will one hari rule the wizarding world.
30. Call him "Tommy-boy".
31. If you're feeling gutsy, call him "Voldie-poo".
32. Be generally in awe of him and never look away.
33. Whack him in the arm and say "mosquito" - every few minutes.
34. If he asks anda about his choice of robes, say he looked better under the turban.
35. Begin any soalan anda ask him with "Riddle me this!" Emphasize on Riddle.
36. Imperio his Death Eaters into a rousing chorus of "All Things Bright And Beautiful".
37. Paint all the Death Eater masks with bright Warna and glitter.
38. Throw him a Carebears-themed birthday party. Bake him a scar-shaped cake.
39. Tell him what Snape's really up to.
40. Politely exclaim now and again that anda don't know how he can be so afraid of dear old Dumbles.
41. Tell him his plastic surgeon did a terrible job with the "red-eyed snake look," and that he should've had the self confidence to age gracefully.
42. Tell him anda know this great therapist in London....
43. Ask him if he's sure the whole evil-maniac-out-for-power-and-revenge thing isn't getting a bit old?
44. Tell him Lucius did it.
45. Write him a theme song. Start Singing it whenever he is about to do atau say something particularly clever and nasty.
46. When he's done something particularly nasty - menyeberang, cross your arms, waggle a finger and say "Now now, do anda really think Salazar would have approved of that?"
47. Make vague allusions to Harry Potter being his son.
48. Ask him how he can possibly wish to harm a single hair on the head of "that sweet, innocent, cute little boy".
49. Ask him why he's afraid of an old man who looks like Santa Claus and why he can't fight babies.
50. Sign him up for Little League.
51. Cuddle him at Rawak moments.
52. Tell him that noses are back in style.
53. Be Harry Potter. Be Alive.
54. Call him "Champ" atau "Tiger", refer to yourself as "Coach".
55. Ask him where he gets his garlic scented soap.
56. Ask him to dye Easter eggs with you
57. ...at Christmas.
58. "Accidentally" schedule him a haircut
59. ...even though he's bald.
60. When he gives anda an order, stare blankly at him and drool.
61. On the seterusnya Valentine's Day, decorate his lair
62. ...make sure the decorations are merah jambu and frilly.
63. Be offended sejak everthing he says.
64. Trade in his black robes for bunny feet pajamas.
65. Three words: Potter Puppet Pals.
P.S. Make sure to print this senarai on Harry Potter Stationary, get it laminated, and give it to him.
I was asked to do this sejak lorythefangirl after I responded to her earlier one.
Pros
1. Most of them did believe they were choosing the winning side at the time
2. They would likely be killed if they refused, atau otherwise punished.
3. If they come from old pureblood families which share the Death Eaters' beliefs, joining up would help maintain family harmony
4. If they're naturally malicious it gives them an opportunity to kill and torture
Cons
1. Most people wouldn't want to be forced to murder. They might be pushed beyond their own limits, e.g. Draco Malfoy.
2. They'd get imprisoned in Azkaban if caught, atau could be killed in self-defence
3. Leaving isn't an option once you're in
4. After they lost, those who'd survived would lose favour even if they avoided punishment
5. Voldemort doesn't seem to be a nice boss
6. It's a story really, and in most stories, the bad guys do end up losing and being punished.
Pros
1. Most of them did believe they were choosing the winning side at the time
2. They would likely be killed if they refused, atau otherwise punished.
3. If they come from old pureblood families which share the Death Eaters' beliefs, joining up would help maintain family harmony
4. If they're naturally malicious it gives them an opportunity to kill and torture
Cons
1. Most people wouldn't want to be forced to murder. They might be pushed beyond their own limits, e.g. Draco Malfoy.
2. They'd get imprisoned in Azkaban if caught, atau could be killed in self-defence
3. Leaving isn't an option once you're in
4. After they lost, those who'd survived would lose favour even if they avoided punishment
5. Voldemort doesn't seem to be a nice boss
6. It's a story really, and in most stories, the bad guys do end up losing and being punished.
