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Five easy ways that lemons can kill you. (some of these are ironic, but if anda think about it, sometimes they can happen!!!)

1. A lemon is lying on the bahagian, atas step, and anda are carrying your laptop in your hands when your about to go down the steps. saat later anda land on your ass, and seterusnya anda are in the hospital with a severe concussion.

2. A lemon is sweet and fresh, and your mother uses it in her cooking. of course, she doesn't see the bite marks on the back of the lemon that was created sejak your dog when the basket was too close to the edge a few days ago, so she squeezes the lemon into her concoction. seterusnya few days anda suffer from unhappy stomach pains and anda are diagnosed with stomach flu.

3. Amazingly, your room is moved near the kitchen, and the bowl of Buah is closest to your room, which is filled with lemons. Late at night, anda wouldn't believe, but anda SWORE anda saw a shadow of a lemon outside of your room, right where the knives would be. anda go to investigate...and there is a pisau seterusnya to the non-moving lemon. What does this mean? It might be too dramatic to place on here...but anda can figure it out.

4. Sometimes, we mistake things the wrong way. Which is why when anda go to the nearest aquarium, try not to mistake the blowfish with the lemon anda have at utama that your sister put pencil points all over. And try not to eat that lemon either, otherwise....well, lead poisoning is low on the chart of popularity deaths.

5. Keep the lemon away from your face when anda open it. They like to be extremely masam that anda are exposing them too much near the apples, so they squirt at anda for doing the deed. Now anda know why most apples found near lemons are red.

Hope these amused you. Some of these are true, some are false. This was just for entertainment. Hopefully this was one of those 'lmao' moments. :)
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Jeff Foxworthy is now picking on Michigan.

If anda consider it a sport to gather your Makanan sejak drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all hari hoping that the Makanan will swim by, anda might live in Michigan .

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each tahun because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, anda might live in Michigan .

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through April, anda might live in Michigan .

If anda instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, anda might live in Michigan .

If someone in a store offers...
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Okay,No need to be so rough on yourself!Because anda know what?IT'S NOT WORTH IT!!!Here are a few reasons that anda must continue to smile,laugh and to the teenagers who want to kill themselves why to live.
1.You're individual!You're yourself!You're not afraid of being who anda are and anda should be proud of it,because not many people are like that!Most of them pretend to be someone who they're not and that often makes them feel worse than you.Seeing that you're happy and you're free to express yourself they get aggressive and they want to make anda feel bad!I say:FUCK THEM!
2.If you're a little...
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anda know you're a 'Furry Fan' when...
Rabies replaces cancer as your number one disease concern.
Your kegemaran character from bintang Trek is Lieutenant M'Ress (from the animated series).
You think "Beauty and the Beast" was spoiled sejak Beast becoming human.
You replace Elle McPherson pinups with those of Amy the Squirrel, Erma Felna, atau Minerva Mink.
You slip the word 'fur' into as many places as possible in your mail.
You can identify a captionless book illustration as being Doug Wingers' in under ten seconds.
None of your kegemaran female (or male) fiction characters are actually human.
You go...
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posted by breebree446
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
EMOTICONS
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

: ) happy face
:-) just kidding atau happy
:-( depressed atau frowning
(:-( extremely Sad
B-) cool atau sunglasses
:-))) overweight
d:-) a baseball player
:-D laughing
:-P tongue sticking out
:-o surprised
8-o shocked
:-s confused
:- skeptical
:-)' drooling
:-)8 well dressed because of bow tie
8-) glasses
*<|:-) Santa
:-{} big mouth
=:-)= punk rocker with a goatee
:v) big nose
:-# braces
:^) broken nose
:-[#] eating
:<) Ivy League school
:-& tongue tied
:*) drunk
:-'] cold
[(:-)](:-( a toupee and it's windy
:-8 talking out of both...
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