His hair was a medium brown. He was so tiny too. Even now, I could see my features in him... and Ty's. I stood there motionless, looking at the little thing in the suitcase crying and throwing his arms and legs in every direction.. Lucy had berkata once anda saw that little baby, you'd instantly fall in Cinta with it. It must not work on all people. I felt nothing for this thing.

I picked it up, re-wrapping the sweater around him. His body was warm; I could nearly feel it through the sweater. I closed the car door and locked it, and went for a walk. The baby continued to cry in my arms, and that didn't make me like him any much more. My legs still hurt immensely, and I limped and staggered as I walked. I had no idea where I was going, but I was tired of being confined to my car.

As I continued walking, the baby kept crying. People gave me dirty looks as I sat on the bus stop bench.

"Would anda get it to stop?" A man asked, on a cellphone. To be honest, I didn't know how to. I turned my eyes away from the man. He groaned and stalked off, apologizing to whoever was on the other end of the line.

A couple hours later, I became desperate to get this thing to shut up. I went up to Rawak women, asking if they could help me. Some pretended they didn't hear me. Others wrinkled their noses in disgust and walked away.

"Ma'm, could anda please help me," I pleaded with a women. She took her daughter's hand and walked away. Tears streamed down my face. "Please." She scoffed.

"Maybe it's hungry," she berkata and stalked off. I blinked. I made my way back to my car, away from everyone. It was strange when I thought about it; this car had been my utama for about five months. I sat down in the back seat, and propped the baby up against me.

***

After the baby was fed, he fell asleep in my arms. I had to admit, it was pretty cute. Still, I didn't need this. It was hard enough on my own. I didn't need this thing to worry about either.

Not even an jam later, the baby woke up, and began crying. I'd never heard anything cry for so long before. Giving up, I got out of the car. I held the baby in my arms, and walked down through town. I looked for a place that had few people, but had someone that would notice once I was gone. Finally, I found an alley way near a building with many people coming in and out. sejak the time I got there, the baby had stopped crying, and looked at me with confused eyes.

Soon I was out of view from the front of the building. I bent down near the ground, and set the baby on the ground. I made sure the sweater was bundled around him tightly, so he wouldn't kick it off and get cold. I may not want this thing, but I didn't want him to die atau anything. Even if he still reminded me of Ty. His little figure seemed even smaller as I set him on the cold, hard, concrete ground. I felt almost nothing as I walked away, careful that no one in the building saw me.

When I began leaving, the baby woke up and started crying. I sped up my walking, and luckily no one at the building noticed yet. No sooner later, I got back to my car/house. I climbed in, and laid down for a much needed nap. I sighed and closed my eyes, but couldn't get to sleep. It felt like a piece of me was gone. I put my hands on my stomach, and it felt odd not having anything there. I pouted, and curled up in a ball.

Then I began to think about my mom. How much it hurt to have her taken away from me. I remember one hari when we were younger, Sicily had been complaining how her mom was so annoying, and how she wouldn't leave her alone. I had gotten so mad. At least Sicily had a mom. A tear rolled down my cheek, and I stubbornly wiped it away with my sleeve.

I was going to regret this.

I gotta out of the car, and began walking. I felt a tugging on my heart, puling me in the direction. Soon, I began running. Finally, I made it to the alley in which I had left the baby. He wasn't there. I cursed, and paced in the alley, running my hands through my hair. My hati, tengah-tengah set itself on fire, and I cried. Tears streamed down my face. I'd had the baby out of me for almost a full day, and he was already gone.

Then I heard talking from the front of the building. They sounded confused and worried. Someone must have him,I thought. Quickly I ran to the front of the building. I must've been a real mess, because the people looked very startled. There were about six of them on the porch of the building, all crowded around one of the people. I didn't know what to say. Not that I could probably say anything anyways; I was hyperventilating.

"Please..." I began. One of the women from the porch took a step down towards me.

"Honey, is that your baby?" she said, pointing behind her. The others moved out of the way of another woman, who was holding a sleeping baby. My sleeping baby. lebih tears flowed down my face, and I closed my eyes and nodded.

"Why was it in the alley?" she questioned. She put her hands on her hips. I could tell she was about to scold me for being a horrible parent. Even though that fact was true, I didn't want to hear it from this stranger.

"My boyfriend," I said. "He took him. He didn't want the baby," I tried to explain. All their expressions changed from resentment to horror.

"Oh my God!" one of them exclaimed. "You left him, right?!" I nodded and held out my arms. The woman holding the baby walked down the steps, and placed the sleeping baby in my arms. It felt like the missing piece inside me had been found. He squirmed slightly through the exchange, and nuzzled his head against me. A tear dropped down on his forehead, but he didn't seem to notice.

"I cannot thank anda enough," I told the men and women. They smiled and nodded. I left them, holding my baby close to me. Quickly, like Lucy had showed me, I managed to find mostly clean Makanan from the dumpster. I ate as I took my baby back to the car, and then fed him there.

Once he was done, my baby yawned, his tiny little mouth formed into a little "o." I stroked his head, and his soft head felt like satin on my hand. I bent my face down to him, and kissed his little forehead. I mentally kicked myself for what I had done earlier. This baby was not Ty, at all. He was my son, so much lebih beautiful and lovelier than Ty.

My son fell asleep against my chest, and I fell asleep holding him close to me. We both slept peacefully that night; my first night with my precious little baby.